SILVER SPRING, Md. --- Last-minute preparations are under way for Annual Council and church leaders have announced that the thornier issues up for debate next week will be settled by way of cage fighting.
Although old-fashioned reasoned debate and prayer may have dominated similar meetings in the past, this year's meetings promise a far more action-packed picture.
"The Annual Council crowd isn't exactly the picture of physical fitness but most analysts agree that you can taste next week's punishment in the air," said Adventist Yesterday reporter Alf Bengtson. "We are pretty sure there will be some gnarly brawling in that cage."
Bengtson said that a lot of the fighters due to attend Annual Council have been well known to throw sharp elbows in the past when push comes to shove.