Slide Show: How to make a Haystack

Ah, haystacks: Beloved dish of NAD Adventists, bafflement to Adventists elsewhere and taco salad to everyone else. Haystacks are typically made with corn chips, protein (usually beans) and assorted vegetables and sauces. The possible combinations are truly mind-boggling and endless. Therefore we humbly present our method to creating this delectable layered feast (and by “humbly present” we mean: Do it this way or else.) So let’s make hay(stacks) while the sun shines!

LEAK: “The Record Keeper” shutdown was marketing ploy

SILVER SPRING, Md. — A leak from the General Conference is taking the Adventist arts world by storm: According to an anonymous source, the controversial GC decision to shut down The Record Read more […]

GYC Earlybird registrants guaranteed a spouse

Organizers of next year’s GYC have announced that registration for the young adult conference is about to open. To encourage early registration, anyone aged 18 to 35 that signs up before Earlybird Read more […]

Dwight Nelson gives 90% of fellow pastors an inferiority complex

BERRIEN SPRINGS, Mich. — “It’s been going on since the ’80s,” said Andrews University-based pastoral therapist, Elsa Bradley. “Nine in 10 Adventist pastors stateside come to my practice Read more […]

50% Adventist discount off Stripples in participating stores this week

Good news for Adventists that enjoy Stripples with their morning eggs/soy products: Major supermarkets nationwide are giving a 50% discount on the product to any and every proven Adventist Read more […]

BarleyAdventist’s first-ever interview

We are super excited to announce that we were recently interviewed for the first time.Ā  Click the link below if you want to know: 1)Ā  Why we publish. 2)Ā  Why we love satire. 3)Ā  The Read more […]

New Union College President recruited to professional softball team

LINCOLN, Neb. — “The timing is a little awkward as I literally just took the job as Union College President,” said Dr. Vinita Sauder, former Vice President for Strategic Initiatives at Southern Read more […]

Retired Adventist youth pastor banned from World Rook Olympics for winning too much

RENO, Nev. — World Rook Olympics officials have officially banned Dave Anderson, a 77-year-old retired Adventist youth pastor, from future competition following his 7th straight Gold medal Read more […]

Slide Show: Great Moments from Cradle Roll

We’re taking it back to the old school because we’re so cool (or old fools). So take a stroll down memory lane with us (or for those who have never been to cradle roll, prepare for sights that may amaze/terrify) and celebrate great moments from cradle roll.

Adventists rate Sabbath afternoon naps as favorite non-salvational faith benefit

Gotta love it…. PASADENA, Calif — Sabbath afternoon naps are one of the most treasured benefits of being an Adventist if a recent survey of 10,000 Adventists from around the world are to Read more […]