Female employee ejected from GC Halloween party for looking “too ordained”

Not the best start to the weekend...
Not the best start to the weekend…
BREAKING NEWS

SILVER SPRING, Md. — The annual world mission-themed Harvest Festival (Halloween) Costume Party at the General Conference headquarters took an unexpected turn today as a female employee was escorted out of the building for looking “too ordained.”

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Stewardship Department Executive Assistant, Mujer Innocente objected to the charge and said that she had not had the time to go look for the kimono she had planned to wear and so had simply come to the party in her usual professional attire.

Lead organizer Manny Olskul rejected Innocente’s explanation, however, claiming that she had deliberately chosen a costume that made her look “too much like leadership material.”

Olskul said, “We’ve just gotten through a very trying summer shooting down female ordination. The last thing we need is someone starting the campaigning once more.”

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11 Comments

  1. GVille

    Well done, Sevvy. Not your most subtle by a longshot, but very funy. I mean, poor Sister Mujer Innocente… and the harsh Br Manny Oldskul. You sure he is no relative, OldSchool? Ha!

    • JERRY FALWELL

      I AGREE. I WILL BE HOLDING A MASS FEMALE ORDINATION ON SUNDAY NIGHT AT THE HOLIDAY INN, ROOM 114. FOR THOSE WHO ARE GENDER CONFUSED THERE WILL BE A DOOR PRIZE. HALLELUJA.
      MUSIC WILL BE PROVIDED BY SISTERS OF SOAP THAT FLOATS. DONATIONS WILL BE ACCEPTED AS LONG AS IT IS IN CASH.

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