Kylie Jenner releases line of Adventist-approved “SabbathLipstick”

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LOS ANGELES, Calif. — Fast on her way to billionairedom, reality star  entrepreneur Kylie Jenner has opened yet another line in her cosmetics empire: Adventist-approved SabbathLipstick.

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According to Kylie Cosmetics, SabbathLipstick has already undergone rigorous testing in “real Adventist church lobbies on randomly-picked Sabbath mornings” and has “successfully made test subjects look amazing without attracting adornment lectures from grumpy church lurkers with nothing better to do.”

SabbathLipstick is described as “natural-looking but not plain” and is “guaranteed to make this Sabbath the ‘happiest of Sabbaths.'”


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One Comment

  1. richeerich

    Is this lipstick another one of those tofu products? Or maybe a soy textured protein extruded by some co-packer in a third world country? Will the lipstick stay on the lips after consuming a healthy meal of haystacks? Will she use a flavor commonly used by Little Debbies? I like that flavor best!!
    Gimme a kiss, baby!!

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