Melashenko Family to tour camp meetings as circus troupe

(We took this post down when we heard (very late) of the June 2013 passing of the Melashenko patriarch. He was a friend with whom we went to church for years and we had the deepest respect for him. After being contacted by Melashenko family members who were disappointed that we removed the post, we have been persuaded to re-publish. Here it is, in honor of a man we loved: Pastor Joseph Melashenko.)

The Melashenkos: an Adventist family dynasty
The Melashenkos: an Adventist family dynasty
“We’ve run away and joined the circus,” cracked Lonnie Melashenko in an interview for Voice of Prophesy, the radio ministry he used to host.

This summer Adventist camp meeting will witness a very different Melashenko Family Singers performance. Lonnie Melashenko and family have abandoned their traditional musical numbers in favor of a high-octane circus act.

“We’re sick of singing the same numbers and thought a circus show might shake things up a little,” said Lonnie. “The trickiest piece so far has been the human pyramid. We’re getting old so it’s looking a little rickety but we have faith that everything will come together.”

The family will tour camp meetings across the English speaking world and beyond. “You don’t need to speak English to witness Melashenkos racing stunt bikes through hoops of fire,” said Lonnie.

His wife Jeannie Melashenko claims to have soldiered through considerable trial and error for her own act and has finally perfected a stunt where she saws relatives in half. “It’s taken a lot of hard work to get here,” said Jeannie, “As people always say: If at first you don’t succeed, there’s always another relative.”

Insiders say that the highlight of the show comes at the very end when randomly-chosen Melashenkos are launched from cannons in a powerful piece of choreography set to “Battle Hymn of the Republic.”

“We are breaking some very new ground this summer,” said Lonnie. “Here’s to hoping no one breaks a hip.”


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7 Comments

  1. Richard Mills

    7/11/14
    I find this satire of the Melsahanko family to be in bad taste. They just lost the family patriarch, Joe Melashanko, not too long ago. Did not find it humorous in the least. I knew Joe when he ministered in the SNEC many years ago. Very dedicated. Choose another subject, please!!

    1. We took this post down when we heard (very late) of the June 2013 passing of the Melashenko patriarch. He was a friend with whom we went to church for years and we had the deepest respect for him. After being contacted by Melashenko family members who were disappointed that we removed the post, we have been persuaded to re-publish. It is re-published above in honor of a man we loved: Pastor Joseph Melashenko.

  2. Kathy Jones

    I enjoyed this post so much, and the little bit of insight into who this remarkable man Joe Melashenko was, through the legacy of his remarkable family! Thanks for sharing. Clever writing, it really made me laugh, I don’t know why! Silliness. I do entirely understand that this is satire, and well, I guess it works for me! lol.

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