COLLEGE PLACE, Wash. — Walla Walla University student leadership have organized a campus-wide hunger strike to protest “inhumane pre-noon classes” that Student Association President, Cody Geraty claims has been forcing countless students to “cut down on late night socializing and actually set alarms” to get up in the mornings.
Student leaders scheduled the hunger fast to take place after this month’s Longest Table event where 2000 Walla Walla University Church members and students sit down to eat and socialize. “Now that the biggest eating event of the year is out of the way, we are confident that Walla Walla students will be able to rally together and end morning classes on this campus once and for all,” said Geraty.
According to student organizers, 95% of the student body has committed to the hunger strike. Volunteer strike enforcers will be stationed at the cafeteria entrance as well as at vending machines across campus. Snacking on ramen packets as well as any and all Taco Bell pilgrimages are also prohibited although organizers acknowledge that regulating such activity will prove challenging.