Pacquiao assumes presidency of Adventist University of the Philippines

President Pacquiao
President Pacquiao
CAVITE, Philippines — Filipino world champion boxer and congressman Manny Pacquiao was named president of the Adventist University of the Philippines in a surprise announcement this morning.

“Congressman Pacquaio brings with him vast international experience and a well-earned reputation for getting things done,” said AUP spokesperson Fidel Ganador. He described Pacquaio as the ideal leader for the institution, praising him as an “icon of excllence as well as a man of faith and principle.”

Although Pacquaio himself has yet to address the student body, he has released a statement promising to “fight for growth and topple barriers to success” for the university. He also promised to install his loyal trainer, Freddie Roach, in the newly-created role of Vice President for Athletics.

The boxer pledged an undisclosed sum to completely renovate the university’s gymnasium and install a state-of-the-art boxing ring in a bid to revolutionize the athletics offerings of the school. He added that “any injuries resulting from student boxing training can easily be treated at our new College of Medicine.”

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13 Comments

  1. Bugs/Larry Boshell

    Awesome, finally a skilled trainer to prepare a battalion of 7up fighters to kick Lucifers butt for Jesus in that endless war against the devil in heaven. They could bring him back to North Korea for a fair trial.

  2. richard mills

    Doesn’t the SOP have a thing or two to say about pugilistic activities??
    What’s this guy got anyway? I believe he lost one of his last fights. No more losers!! Woe iz me!

  3. richard mills

    I must have watched the fight on a Friday night. Time just slips away when you are guarding the edges of the Sabbath. Won’t let it happen again. I promise to be a faithful sentinel. I promise! From now on it’s all 3ABN, HOPETV, etc. Pathfinder’s Code of Honor. Woe iz me!!

  4. Lodel Deles

    SDA managerial positions where not picked up anywhere even if he is the president of the country,we have a nominating committee who selects higher positions in the Constitution from local unions,conferences,divisions.FYI universities and colleges presidency must be a teacher or pastor holding phd,ph.ed degrees.

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