Many respondents detailed the reasons for their gratititude as stemming from the “absolute horror” they experienced while witnessing something as innocent as their Adventist friends attempting a victory dance to celebrate good news, said Porfa. “Respondents scarred from such an experience expressed a strong desire never, ever to see Adventists attempt a jig again.”
He shared that respondents wrote long comments about not being able to erase from their minds the astounding lack of physical coordination exhibited by their Adventist friends. Porfa said that many respondents claimed the Adventists in their lives “could not even tap their toes on beat to a gospel tune.”
Porfa added that in light of demonstrated and dire lack of Adventist ability, most respondents were heavily in favor of strict no-dancing policies being kept in place at Adventist academies and colleges to avoid even the “appearance of dancing.”
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The name of the researcher, Para Porfa, is quit apropos. Folks probably really do wish they would “stop, please.”
But it’s OK to dance as long as you “leave room for the Holy Spirit” by leaving at least one foot of distance between you and your dance partner.
Only one foot? Is that far enough?
Actually, it’s supposed to be “at least one Bible-length,” referring to one of those big Postum-table family Bibles.
Ha! It’s funny how similar this photo is to the cartoon that you linked about leaving room. . . .
But they really shouldn’t be touching at all. It might excite the “animal passions.” Didn’t you know that the Immaculate EGW had her children through osmosis?
THE YOUTH ACTIVITIES DIRECTOR AT OUR CHURCH WILL DANCE FOR YOU IF YOU GIVE A LOVE OFFERING.
Dancing is bad, only if you call it “dancing.” It’s fine if you call it “mime” or “marching.” Sorry, Shakespeare, a rose by any other name is not a rose.
Dancing is moving one’s body rythmically in time to music, or in a manner of artistic expression with the movements of the body, and there has to be something intrinsically evil and sinful and very very bad about that.
God never intended our bodies to move rythmically to music. No way.
Amen, Ray, Amen!
Hey, Teddy, I recognize you from the GC Papacy!
Even I can tap my toe to Gospel tunes better than SDAs. No wonder Donald Tramp admires me so much.
I think some sda intuitively know how to dance, such as the children, they have to get it shamed out of them. One time at a Sabbath afternoon program, 2 little girls got up holding hands and danced in circles. The damper go put on them, pronto
Excellent! Got nip it in the bud, just like I will shred O’Bomber’s agreement with Iran, on my first day in office.
Well, O’Bomber knows exactly what he’s doing. Let’s dispel once and for all with this fiction that Barack O’Bomber doesn’t know what he’s doing. He knows exactly what he’s doing. I’ll say it again: we have to stop believing that O’Bomber doesn’t know what he’s doing. He knows exactly what he’s doing and he’s trying to destroy America.
See, there is again: the 25-second memorized canned speech, like a broken record.
Quiet, big guy. SNL’s Bobby Moynihan does a better Chris Christie impression than you yourself, and he’s a heck of a lot funnier than you. Come to think of it, Larry David’s impression is a lot funner than Burny Sanders, too. In fact, I’m not sure which one is Burny and which one is David!
Well, this is too true to be satire. So sad.
There’s a most wondrous movie out, got it from Redbox last week, “DESERT DANCER,” the true story of a young boy who saw a film of the great Rudolph Nuryev dancing, and from that moment he wanted to dance, like Nuryev, except that he lived in Iran where dancing was a very grave sin that could get you beaten and killed.
21 thumbs up. Every Adventist should see it. Everybody else should see it too. It’s a true story, so it’s okay. And you can rent it and watch it at home, don’t have to go to a theater, so it’s okay. Well, okay, it’s a movie, so maybe it’s not okay.
Ray, did you say you watched a movie? I’m ordering the SBI to investigate this matter. In case you didn’t know, the SBI is my FBI-style Scriptural Bureau of Investigation. So, Ray, would you like to recant?
WARNING: Henceforth, any Adventist caught dancing, or even THINKING about dancing, shall be whipped with a wet noodle, beaten with a feather, and deported to Miami. (And if Donald Tramp is elected, you shall also be extradited to his jurisdiction for waterboarding and worse!)
Dance-Schmance. It all depends on how you define dance. If I jump up & down to my country music, is it a dance? If I move my feet to my Irish heritage jigs & reels is it a dance? What about those colorful, costumed delegates who march, parade, dance out on the GC stage every 5 years? What izzit? Maybe I need to imitate David and go naked?
Somebody help me out. I’m ready to pull out what hair is left on my head.
Dosey Doe-go to the left-swing yor partner round & round. Woe iz me!!
If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear it, did it make a sound?
Well, I can’t dance either, and I’m Catholic. So there! By the way, vote for me, and I’ll vote for you. ~John Elvis “Jeb” Brush.
Shh … quiet, “tough guy.” We all know your name is actually “Jebra.” The reason you can’t dance is ’cause you’re so “low energy.” Even a snail has more energy than you. But don’t worry; if you’re really lucky you might get to be my VP. It’s OK if a VP is low-energy, ’cause VP’s don’t really do anything (except make gaffes to embarrass the prez, like poor Joe Biten’ and Dan Quayle. As VP, Quayle made official visits to 47 countries and made a fool of himself in at least 46.).
~ BREAKING NEWS ~
Southern Adventist University Announces 26th President
Collegedale, Tenn.– Today Southern Adventist University’s Board of Trustees unanimously voted to formally invite Dr. Benjamin S. Carson to serve as the school’s 26th president. After much prayer, Carson has accepted the position.
“I am honored to follow Gordon Bietz who has provided Southern with 19 years of distinguished leadership,” Carson said. “I look forward to partnering with God and all who are associated with Southern to see how He will make a special school even more special.”
Carson, a retired neurosurgeon, is no stranger to the campus, having donated his services to perform lobotomies on students and staff during a 17 year period in the ’80s and ’90s. Though an exact start date has yet to be determined, Dr. Carson looks forward to working alongside President Bietz in the months leading up to his retirement.
Accordingly, Dr. Carson has announced that he is suspending his campaign for nomination as the Republican presidential candidate. “Serving as President of Southern is a far greater honor than running for President of the United States, and I really like the Collegedale area a lot better than Washington, D.C.,” said Dr. Carson in a news release.