Thursday, April 23, 2026
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Adventist Education

Do Adventist schools have to have Adventist teachers?

My daughter goes to what I can honestly say is an outstanding Adventist elementary school. In fact, it’s the only Adventist primary school in Britain ever to receive an...
#NotSatire

Why I Love Toddler Group

I’m pretty involved in my local church, but if I’m honest, my favorite ministry doesn’t happen on Sabbath. It happens at 10:00 a.m. on Fridays—during toddler group. About 100 people...
#NotSatire

Prayer Is Not a Prescription. (God Made Therapists Too.)

Somewhere along the way we decided that struggling Christians just weren’t praying hard enough. Depression? More devotions.Anxiety? Claim the victory.Trauma? Have you tried fasting? We meant well. We also did damage. Adventists of all...
#NotSatire

The Resurrection Didn’t Need a Ham Dinner to Be Real

Every spring, Adventists perform a quiet liturgy of our own. The rest of Christianity buys lilies and books brunch. We… move on. Sabbath School covers the quarterly....
#NotSatire

We Quote Paul’s Thorn. We Never Talk About Our Own.

Paul gets referenced a lot in Adventist circles. His missionary journeys, his theology, his letters that built half the New Testament. We love Paul. We...
Social Justice

Local Adventist Discovers Caring for the Poor Is Not a Liberal Conspiracy—But Actually, Like… Half the Bible

SPRINGFIELD, USA — In a shocking turn of events during this week’s Sabbath School discussion, local Adventist Mark Jensen reportedly discovered that caring for...
Pioneers

Adventists Should Go First

Ellen G. White started a health reform movement when doctors were still prescribing whiskey. Our founders built hospitals in the wilderness, launched schools on...

Adventist Culture

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We Can Do Vastly Better

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    For a group that often specializes in self-criticism, it’s...

Does BarelyAdventist Hate the Church?

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Between the satire, the memes, the open questions, the...

When Testimony Time Feels Like a Competition

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Testimony time can be one of the most beautiful...

You Are Not a Prophet

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  For decades, the Adventist Church has had people who...

Adventist Food

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Would Adventist Leaders Be in Better Shape If They Actually Believed the Health Message?

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Long before Blue Zones were trendy, we were warning...

Why do people leave Adventism relieved—and why don’t we want to hear that?

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When people leave Adventism, many describe something unexpected: relief. Not...

Adventist prays for sun to stand still so she can finish her Friday chores

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LONDON, England --- An Adventist woman paused in prayer...

Christian intimacy book, “The Adventist Missionary Position,” hits shelves

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NAMPA, Idaho --- In an attempt to counter secular...

Sabbath Observance

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Local Adventist Agrees With Pope, Deeply Uncomfortable About It

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Man unsure whether to share article or burn phone COLLEGEDALE,...

Silver Spring Is Not Heaven. Fortunately, That’s Not the Point.

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If you’ve spent any time watching the General Conference...

Forty-Two Percent of Everyone Who Joins Us Eventually Leaves. Let’s Talk About That.

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That’s not a rounding error. That’s a pattern. Since 1965,...

Doubt Doesn’t Break Your Faith. Pretending Does.

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Nobody leaves Adventism because they asked too many questions. They...

BarelyAdventist is a satire and humor blog focused on Adventist culture and issues. Written by committed Adventists, the goal is to foster growth within the faith community through lighthearted conversation and humor, avoiding soapboxing or angry rants. The blog is not officially endorsed by the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists.

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