Wednesday, April 1, 2026
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We Quote Paul’s Thorn. We Never Talk About Our Own.

Paul gets referenced a lot in Adventist circles. His missionary journeys, his theology, his letters that built half the New Testament. We love Paul. We also love citing his thorn....
Uncategorized

Your Gay Kid Didn’t Leave Because of the World. They Left Because of Us.

We told the story wrong for decades. The version we preferred went like this: the world is seductive, the flesh is weak, and our children—raised on memory verses, Revelation seminars,...
Grace

Adventist Shaming: A Better Way Forward

There are many absolutely beautiful aspects of Adventism. I say that sincerely as a happy, grateful Adventist. Our commitment to health, education, service, and the Bible has shaped lives around the...
Church Growth

We Can Do Vastly Better

    For a group that often specializes in self-criticism, it’s worth pausing to notice something: the Adventist experiment is actually working. We take the Bible seriously—sometimes...
Adventist Publishing

Does BarelyAdventist Hate the Church?

Between the satire, the memes, the open questions, the essays, the sharp takes, and everything else we publish, there are people who genuinely believe...
Church Growth

Why do people leave Adventism relieved—and why don’t we want to hear that?

When people leave Adventism, many describe something unexpected: relief. Not bitterness. Not rebellion. Relief. Relief from constant self-monitoring. Relief from the low-grade anxiety of never quite...
Uncategorized

Adventist prays for sun to stand still so she can finish her Friday chores

LONDON, England --- An Adventist woman paused in prayer this afternoon, pleading for the sun to stand still so she could finish her long...

Adventist Culture

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Pathfinders Might Be the Best Thing We’ve Ever Done

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For a surprising number of people who leave the...

The Gap Between Truth and Connection: Why People Aren’t Feeling Adventism

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Here’s a confession many Adventist leaders won’t make in...

If Your Theology Doesn’t Reduce Anxiety, People Will Find One That Does

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An anxious generation will not be discipled by a...

We’re Talking About the Wrong Things and it’s Costing Adventism its Future

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Every generation has its theological debates. That’s not new. Still,...

Adventist Food

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No, You Can’t Hasten the Second Coming

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Somewhere along the way, “sharing the gospel” turned into...

ABC Stores Don’t Know What to Do With Leftover Carob

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February 15th: chocolate’s gone, hearts are broken, and ABC...

Local Deacon Reminds Wife Submission Would Improve Communication Flow

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SPRINGDALE, USA — Local deacon Mark Halvorsen confirmed Tuesday...

English Is Over: The Global Church Is Moving On

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Adventism has long assumed North American English was the...

Sabbath Observance

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5 Polite Ways to Tell the Global Majority That the Adults Are Still Talking

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  A resource for institutions navigating the awkward gap between...

Breaking the Cycle of Adventist Blackmail

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In Adventist circles, everyone knows everyone else’s business—and sometimes...

We’re Not a Cult… We’re Just Theologically Spicy

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The cult label gets thrown at Adventists because we’re...

Friendship Isn’t a Mission Field

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When people talk about “friendship evangelism,” it often feels...

BarelyAdventist is a satire and humor blog focused on Adventist culture and issues. Written by committed Adventists, the goal is to foster growth within the faith community through lighthearted conversation and humor, avoiding soapboxing or angry rants. The blog is not officially endorsed by the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists.

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