Wednesday, May 6, 2026
spot_img
End Times

Can You Actually Prepare for the End Times?

There’s a whole subculture in Adventism that treats the end times like an extreme survival series. Seminars on spotting the final signs. Checklists for rural relocation. Tutorials on off-grid...
Uncategorized

The Great Disappointment 2.0: Finding Out Catholics Actually Like Jesus Too

  Growing up Adventist, the "Great Controversy" worldview doesn’t just offer a timeline. It offers a protagonist-centered thriller. In this narrative, the Vatican isn’t just a religious institution. It’s the final...
Uncategorized

What If the Three Angels Actually Had Good News?

We’ve turned the Three Angels’ Messages into the theological equivalent of a car alarm — loud, urgent, and ignored by everyone except the people already inside the building. Ask most Adventists what...
Grace

Pastor Delivers Entire Sermon On Grace, Ends With 11-Point Checklist

In what attendees are calling “a spiritual experience with a very unexpected landing,” Pastor Doug Finley delivered what many described as the most powerful...
#NotSatire

How Worried Should You be that Your Congregation isn’t Growing?

Look, let’s be real for a second. If your church has been the same twenty-seven faithful souls for the last decade, something’s off. Jesus...
#NotSatire

Doubt Doesn’t Break Your Faith. Pretending Does.

Nobody leaves Adventism because they asked too many questions. They leave because they asked questions—and got silence, sidelong glances, and a Sabbath School quarterly that...
#NotSatire

Prayer Is Not a Prescription. (God Made Therapists Too.)

Somewhere along the way we decided that struggling Christians just weren’t praying hard enough. Depression? More devotions.Anxiety? Claim the victory.Trauma? Have you tried fasting? We meant...

Adventist Culture

Continue to the category

Local Adventist Discovers Caring for the Poor Is Not a Liberal Conspiracy—But Actually, Like… Half the Bible

0
SPRINGFIELD, USA — In a shocking turn of events...

Adventists Should Go First

0
Ellen G. White started a health reform movement when...

Potluck Will Save The Church

0
Theologians have failed us. The GC has (frequently) failed...

5 Polite Ways to Tell the Global Majority That the Adults Are Still Talking

0
  A resource for institutions navigating the awkward gap between...

Adventist Food

Continue to the category

We’re Not a Cult… We’re Just Theologically Spicy

0
The cult label gets thrown at Adventists because we’re...

Friendship Isn’t a Mission Field

0
When people talk about “friendship evangelism,” it often feels...

Adventist Shaming: A Better Way Forward

0
There are many absolutely beautiful aspects of Adventism. I...

We Can Do Vastly Better

0
    For a group that often specializes in self-criticism, it’s...

Sabbath Observance

Continue to the category

Do Adventist schools have to have Adventist teachers?

0
My daughter goes to what I can honestly say...

Why I Love Toddler Group

0
I’m pretty involved in my local church, but if...

Are You a Homeless Adventist?

0
Not doctrinally. Not officially. Just… practically. You believe the message. You’re...

The Hymnal Knew Things Contemporary Worship Forgot

0
There’s a theological argument buried in the index of...

BarelyAdventist is a satire and humor blog focused on Adventist culture and issues. Written by committed Adventists, the goal is to foster growth within the faith community through lighthearted conversation and humor, avoiding soapboxing or angry rants. The blog is not officially endorsed by the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists.

Categories

Trending

© BarelyAdventist