Thursday, April 16, 2026
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The Hymnal Knew Things Contemporary Worship Forgot

There’s a theological argument buried in the index of the Seventh-day Adventist Hymnal that contemporary worship music never bothered to have. Not because the old songs were better written. Some...
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What If the Three Angels Actually Had Good News?

We’ve turned the Three Angels’ Messages into the theological equivalent of a car alarm — loud, urgent, and ignored by everyone except the people already inside the building. Ask most...
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Your Gay Kid Didn’t Leave Because of the World. They Left Because of Us.

We told the story wrong for decades. The version we preferred went like this: the world is seductive, the flesh is weak, and our children—raised on memory verses, Revelation seminars, and Vacation...
Ellen White

Ellen Was a Sick Teenage Girl Who Changed the World. Don’t Underestimate What You Have.

She was nine years old when a rock hit her in the face and changed the trajectory of her life. The injury left her disfigured,...
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You Are Not a Backslider. You Are a Human Being Having a Hard Time.

  We have a word for people who are struggling. We call them backsliders—which is a remarkable thing to call someone. It implies direction. It implies...
Adventists Speak Up

5 Polite Ways to Tell the Global Majority That the Adults Are Still Talking

  A resource for institutions navigating the awkward gap between demographic reality and organizational inertia. 1. “We Value Your Perspective.” This phrase is extremely useful because it...
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Breaking the Cycle of Adventist Blackmail

In Adventist circles, everyone knows everyone else’s business—and sometimes that knowledge becomes power. Blackmail here isn’t mobsters in dark alleys; it’s gossip, selective judgment,...

Adventist Culture

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You Are Not a Prophet

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  For decades, the Adventist Church has had people who...

Superstitious Church leaders scrap 13th Sabbath tradition

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SILVER SPRING, Md. --- In a dramatic shift for...

Would Adventist Leaders Be in Better Shape If They Actually Believed the Health Message?

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Long before Blue Zones were trendy, we were warning...

Why do people leave Adventism relieved—and why don’t we want to hear that?

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When people leave Adventism, many describe something unexpected: relief. Not...

Adventist Food

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Christian intimacy book, “The Adventist Missionary Position,” hits shelves

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NAMPA, Idaho --- In an attempt to counter secular...

What If Pastors Had Public Report Cards?

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Every Adventist kid remembers report card day. The quiet...

When Ellen Put James on Ice

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Forget the image of Adventist pioneers singing hymns on...

Is It Time to Say Goodbye to Ellen White?

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There’s a question that feels increasingly unavoidable in Adventism’s...

Sabbath Observance

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Doubt Doesn’t Break Your Faith. Pretending Does.

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Nobody leaves Adventism because they asked too many questions. They...

Prayer Is Not a Prescription. (God Made Therapists Too.)

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Somewhere along the way we decided that struggling Christians...

The Resurrection Didn’t Need a Ham Dinner to Be Real

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Every spring, Adventists perform a quiet liturgy of our...

We Quote Paul’s Thorn. We Never Talk About Our Own.

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Paul gets referenced a lot in Adventist circles. His...

BarelyAdventist is a satire and humor blog focused on Adventist culture and issues. Written by committed Adventists, the goal is to foster growth within the faith community through lighthearted conversation and humor, avoiding soapboxing or angry rants. The blog is not officially endorsed by the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists.

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