Monday, February 23, 2026
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If Your Theology Doesn’t Reduce Anxiety, People Will Find One That Does

An anxious generation will not be discipled by a fearful church. We are living in an age of burnout, rising depression, economic instability, and constant digital alarm bells. People are...
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We’re Talking About the Wrong Things and it’s Costing Adventism its Future

Every generation has its theological debates. That’s not new. Still, something feels off. Some of our conversations don’t seem to reach the places people are actually hurting. We’re dissecting timelines while people...
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Frustrated Millennial Realizes “Dating Within the Faith” Limits Options to Her Third Cousin and the Guy Who Still Wears a Tie-Dye Revelation Seminar Shirt

COLLEGE PLACE, WA — Local Adventist millennial Hannah R. reportedly experienced a moment of sobering clarity this week after realizing that “dating within the faith” had narrowed her romantic prospects to...
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Can This Church Tell the Truth About Itself Without Panicking?

Young Adventists aren’t asking a hundred different questions. They’re asking one: Can this church tell the truth about itself without panicking? They’re watching what happens...
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Church Shouldn’t Feel Like Walking on Eggshells

Somewhere along the way, church became a place where many of us lower our voices, rehearse our sentences, and scan the room before saying...
#NotSatire

You Can Love the Church and Still Demand Better From It

You Can Love the Church and Still Demand Better From It Too often, Adventism mistakes loyalty for silence. Speak up about mistakes, question leadership, or...
#NotSatire

Study Reveals: Nobody Believes Pastor When He Says “In Conclusion” on Sabbath Morning

Study Reveals—A new Sabbath-morning study confirms that no Adventist anywhere believes a pastor when he says the words “in conclusion,” having learned through decades...

Adventist Culture

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You’re Not Falling Apart — You’re Just Living in a Broken World

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Let’s be honest. Some days feel less like walking...

Why Adventists Think They’re Different (and Why That Can Be Good)

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Yes, Adventists are different. We wake up early on...

Adventist College Replaces DEI Officer With Suggestion Box

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In a bold move toward administrative efficiency, a major...

Trump Vows Never to Put Tariffs on Adventists Because Ben Carson

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WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a bold new economic promise...

Adventist Food

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We Say ‘Present Truth’ but Panic Every Time It Actually Shows Up

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Adventism loves the phrase present truth. It sounds forward-looking,...

GC Officials Open Fire On Anti-Carob Protestors, Drenching Them Thoroughly With Super Soakers

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SILVER SPRING, MD — Chaos erupted outside the General...

Trump Tells NATO: “Iron and Clay Feet? No Way They Can Defend Greenland!”

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  WASHINGTON, D.C. — US President Donald Trump delivered a...

Does BarelyAdventist Hate the Church?

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Between the satire, the memes, the open questions, the...

Sabbath Observance

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In Defense of Adventism

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  Adventism is worth defending. Not the messy parts we...

Do You Ever Wonder Whether Adventist Satire Is Misunderstood by People Who Don’t Know the Church from the Inside?

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Absolutely. That’s probably the central risk of doing satire...

Adventists Say They’d Feel Much Better If His Name Was “Good Bunny”

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SILVER SPRING, MD — A growing number of Adventists...

Conference Officials Remind Members That “The Investigative Judgment” Does Not Apply to Your Neighbor’s Choice of Lawn Ornament

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  TAKOMA PARK, MD — Conference officials issued a gentle...

BarelyAdventist is a satire and humor blog focused on Adventist culture and issues. Written by committed Adventists, the goal is to foster growth within the faith community through lighthearted conversation and humor, avoiding soapboxing or angry rants. The blog is not officially endorsed by the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists.

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