Thursday, April 9, 2026
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Forty-Two Percent of Everyone Who Joins Us Eventually Leaves. Let’s Talk About That.

That’s not a rounding error. That’s a pattern. Since 1965, more than 18.5 million people have joined the Seventh-day Adventist Church and then walked away from it. Eighteen and a...
#NotSatire

Doubt Doesn’t Break Your Faith. Pretending Does.

Nobody leaves Adventism because they asked too many questions. They leave because they asked questions—and got silence, sidelong glances, and a Sabbath School quarterly that pretended the question didn’t exist. We...
Adventists Speak Up

5 Polite Ways to Tell the Global Majority That the Adults Are Still Talking

  A resource for institutions navigating the awkward gap between demographic reality and organizational inertia. 1. “We Value Your Perspective.” This phrase is extremely useful because it is both warm and consequence-free. It communicates...
Uncategorized

Breaking the Cycle of Adventist Blackmail

In Adventist circles, everyone knows everyone else’s business—and sometimes that knowledge becomes power. Blackmail here isn’t mobsters in dark alleys; it’s gossip, selective judgment,...
Peculiar People

We’re Not a Cult… We’re Just Theologically Spicy

The cult label gets thrown at Adventists because we’re different. Saturday worship. State of the dead. The investigative judgment. We get it — we’re...
Adventists Speak Up

When Testimony Time Feels Like a Competition

Testimony time can be one of the most beautiful moments in church—a chance to witness God at work in someone’s life. But too often,...
Uncategorized

You Are Not a Prophet

  For decades, the Adventist Church has had people who feel it’s their personal duty to correct everyone else. Emails packed with Ellen White quotes....

Adventist Culture

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When Ellen Put James on Ice

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Forget the image of Adventist pioneers singing hymns on...

Is It Time to Say Goodbye to Ellen White?

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There’s a question that feels increasingly unavoidable in Adventism’s...

How Does Adventism Look Without Americans in Charge?

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Something quietly historic is happening in the Seventh-day Adventist...

How Should Adventists Feel About Muslims?

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Right now, Islam is everywhere in the news. With...

Adventist Food

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The Gap Between Truth and Connection: Why People Aren’t Feeling Adventism

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Here’s a confession many Adventist leaders won’t make in...

If Your Theology Doesn’t Reduce Anxiety, People Will Find One That Does

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An anxious generation will not be discipled by a...

We’re Talking About the Wrong Things and it’s Costing Adventism its Future

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Every generation has its theological debates. That’s not new. Still,...

The Law Isn’t Legalism (Calm Down)

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These days, talking seriously about the Ten Commandments feels...

Sabbath Observance

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Here’s Why the Mormons Are Way Richer Than Us

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It’s not magic—it’s culture, structure, and theology. Members of...

Local Adventist Discovers Caring for the Poor Is Not a Liberal Conspiracy—But Actually, Like… Half the Bible

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SPRINGFIELD, USA — In a shocking turn of events...

Adventists Should Go First

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Ellen G. White started a health reform movement when...

Potluck Will Save The Church

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Theologians have failed us. The GC has (frequently) failed...

BarelyAdventist is a satire and humor blog focused on Adventist culture and issues. Written by committed Adventists, the goal is to foster growth within the faith community through lighthearted conversation and humor, avoiding soapboxing or angry rants. The blog is not officially endorsed by the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists.

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