Monday, April 21, 2025

Sabbath Observance

Adventist Dog Prays Before Meals, Refuses to Fetch on Sabbath

SILVER SPRING, Md. — An Adventist family's dog named Samson has developed some unique habits. The Johnson family of Silver Spring first noticed something was up when Samson began to...

Marriage On Rocks Due to Clashing Sabbath Dishwashing Beliefs

It all began innocently enough when both Sam and Lily Thompson stumbled into their kitchen and found themselves knee-deep in a festive seven-layered mess...

Advent-Lift Ride-Sharing App, Promises to Get You to Church on Time (or Your Tithe Back!)

SILVER SPRING, Md. — Tired of showing up late to Sabbath School because you refused to start your car on holy time? Fear not,...

Local Adventist Invokes “Ox in the Ditch” Loophole to Work on Beating Video Game Level

LOMA LINDA, Calif. — Local Adventist gamer Landon Reese invoked the rarely used "ox in the ditch" clause this past Sabbath to continue working...

New Adventist Board Game ‘Sabbath Loopholes’ Becomes Overnight Sensation

In a surprising turn of events, a new board game called "Sabbath Loopholes" has taken the Adventist world by storm, selling out in record...

Local Adventist Sets New Personal Record: Showered, Shaved, and Changed in 2.5 Minutes Before Friday Sundown

In a display of pre-Sabbath gymnastics that would make even Ellen White raise an eyebrow, local Adventist John Doe has set a new personal...

Berrien Woman Claims To-Do List Magically Expands on Fridays

BERRIEN COUNTY, MI - For Mildred Tibbles of Berrien County, preparing for the Sabbath has become a weekly battle against an invisible, and some...

Should You Invite People to Sabbath Lunch if You Haven’t Cleaned?

Let's face it, sometimes cleaning for before Friday sunset falls by the wayside. Here's a cheat sheet to navigate the social minefield of inviting...

Next GC Session Entirely Dedicated To Generating List of Sabbath-Approved Cartoons

The next General Conference Session promises to be a nail-biter. Forget about pronouncements on women's ordination or eschatological debates. This time, the minds at...

Adventist Sues Rolex After Missing Friday Sundown Due to Slow Watch

A devout Seventh-Day Adventist has taken legal action against luxury watchmaker Rolex, alleging that their slow timepiece caused them to miss the sacred Friday...

Ladida SDA Church Replaces “Happy Sabbath” with “Namaste” Greeting

Ladida, Maine - In a move that has sent ripples of controversy through the Ladida Seventh-day Adventist Church, the church board has decided to...