Monday, April 21, 2025

Sabbath

GC Emails Members: “What Sinful Work Did You Sneak in Last Sabbath?”

SILVER SPRING, Md. — In a bold move inspired by Elon Musk’s federal efficiency crusade, the General Conference (GC) of Seventh-day Adventists emailed all 22 million members worldwide this...

9 Ways We’ve Made the Sabbath More Stressful Than Tuesday  

What began as a divine invitation to rest can now resembles a spiritual decathlon—complete with potluck rivalries, sermon analytics, and Sabbath school showdowns. In...

Study Reveals Direct Link Between January and Decreased “Happy Sabbath” Utterances

Researchers at Loma Linda University have uncovered a startling correlation between the month of January and a significant decline in the frequency of "Happy...

GC MOVIE – Heaven Entrance Exam Leaked: “What Day is the Sabbath?” Only Question

The upcoming General Conference-produced movie "The Pearly Gates Dilemma" has leaked a controversial scene that has the Adventist community buzzing. The scene reveals that...

Berrien Woman Claims To-Do List Magically Expands on Fridays

BERRIEN COUNTY, MI - For Mildred Tibbles of Berrien County, preparing for the Sabbath has become a weekly battle against an invisible, and some...

Ladida SDA Church Replaces “Happy Sabbath” with “Namaste” Greeting

Ladida, Maine - In a move that has sent ripples of controversy through the Ladida Seventh-day Adventist Church, the church board has decided to...

“Will Ted Wilson be GC President until the Second Coming?” and Other Kosher Sabbath Lunch Conversation Topics

Been invited to Sabbath lunch but don’t know what’s kosher to talk about? Here’s a carefully vetted list of Sabbath-appropriate conversation topics: The merits...

Why Sabbath is Awesome

Sabbath is coming and here are a few reasons that is awesome😀 Enough!!! We actually get to take a divinely-inspired breather from everything. ESSENTIAL for mental...

Pastor Suing British Union Conference for Making Him Work on Sabbath

WATFORD, Herts. — A stressed out, nearly-ordained pastor has filed a religious discrimination lawsuit against the British Union Conference of Seventh-day Adventists. The Adventist...

Song Service Leader On His 4th “Happy Sabbath Church!” Clearly Just Killing Time

Leafy Glen, Tenn. - His first overly-chipper “Happy Sabbath Church!” helped snap members out of their late morning slumber at the start of divine...

Big Pharma Races To Release Anti-Anxiety Benefits Of Sabbath In Pill Form

WORLD --- Pharmaceutical giants are sprinting to be the first to produce a Sabbath pill. Research labs are working around the clock to create...