Saturday, November 9, 2024

Adventist Culture

Adventist Baby’s First Words: “Happy Sabbath!”

LOMA LINDA, Calif. — In a stunning display of spiritual precocity, 6-month-old Jedediah Remnant stunned his parents and pediatrician by uttering the words "Happy Sabbath!" as his very first...

New Adventist Board Game ‘Sabbath Loopholes’ Becomes Overnight Sensation

In a surprising turn of events, a new board game called "Sabbath Loopholes" has taken the Adventist world by storm, selling out in record...

99% of Adventists Would Rather Get Root Canals Than Teach Teen Sabbath School

A recent survey has found that an overwhelming majority of church members would prefer to undergo multiple root canals than volunteer to teach the...

Pastor Fundraising for New Wing Sick of People Saying Church “Is Not a Building”

Pastor Michael Reynolds has a massive headache, and it's not from too many rounds of "Bringing in the Sheaves" on Sabbath mornings. No, his...

10 Awkward Moments Every Adventist Has Experienced at Church

We’ve all been there. Church is a place of worship, community, and sometimes, those cringe-worthy moments that make you want to hide under the...

Which Adventist Pioneer Are You? Take the Quiz to Find Out!

  Think you’re the Ellen White of your crew, or that you’ve got the scholarly swag of James White? Maybe you’re secretly as adventurous as...

Local Adventist’s Excuse For Turning Down All Volunteering: “I Don’t Want to be a Martha”

Local Adventist Joe Hashbrown has decided to “take a stand against the patriarchal volunteerism culture that has oppressed church ladies for centuries. “ "I'm just...

7 Reasons Adventists Should Laugh

1. We Can Take Ourselves Too Seriously Let’s face it, sometimes we’re just way too earnest. A little humor goes a long way in reminding...

Local Adventist Prays For Release From Post-Service Conversation With Chatty Member

Local Adventist Matthew Thompson found himself in desperate need of divine intervention this past Sabbath as he became ensnared in a post-service conversation with...

Signs You’ve Entered A California Adventist Church

1. The Welcome Committee Hands You a Latte You knew you were in for something different when you were greeted with a smile and a...

Church AV Guy Thinks Neuralink Implants Are Key to Sinless Living

The following is a late-night email our church received from our AV guy, Chad, who is pretty excited: Let's face it, folks, most of us...