Burger King to Adventist Children’s Sabbath Schools: “Stop stealing crowns!”

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Burger King crowns – the ultimate Sabbath School prop… Photo by Jimmy Mobley

MIAMI-DADE COUNTY, Fla. — Burger King’s corporate office has registered an official complaint with the North American Division’s Children’s Ministries Department. The grievance focuses on the “alarming percentage of Burger King crown inventory that has been appropriated by Adventist Sabbath School teachers across the United States.”

Although the fast food chain’s complaint stops short of legal action, Burger King’s Vice President for Customer Relations, Joe Scarborough, says the message is clear: “Enough is enough.”

In his letter to the NAD, Scarborough stressed that “Adventist crown drain” from Burger King restaurants is nothing new. “We have tried to be patient but according to our records we are entering into the fourth decade of Adventist over-consumption of our crowns. This has gone too far!”

The NAD has not yet formally responded to Burger King’s complaint but senior pastors across America received a strongly-worded email blast from NAD Children’s Ministries Director, Heather Dawson, warning them to ban further use of Burger King crowns for Sabbath School or Vacation Bible School programming in their churches.

In the email the NAD offered to subsidize legitimate bulk purchases of paper crowns by congregations. “Any mom-and-pop party supply store can sell you crowns very inexpensively,” said Dawson in her email, “there is no justification for church members bumming Burger Kings crowns from restaurants.”

In a follow-up email Dawson said that because of “a torrent of replies from church offices asking the same question” she was officially including one clarification: “Putting a Jesus sticker over the Burger King logo doesn’t make crown smuggling OK.”

An Adventist parent upon receiving news of the ban... Photo by Jimmy Mobley
A Sabbath School teacher upon receiving news of the ban…
Photo by Jimmy Mobley
Special thanks to Andy Iverson for the story idea

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    1. …and (official name) ‘Veggie Whoppers’, viz ‘Whopper no meat’… and don’t pay full price. They should knock off $1 and if not, leave.
      I was SDA From birth. Pure obstainer (Lacto-Ovo Veg) at 13, not at birth.

      Confirmed again: Veggie Burgers, too!
      NOTE: Veggie Burgers Rn’t Veggie Whoppers!

  1. Richard Mills

    Stop the presses!! The local BK has raided our church. The manager and his minions confiscated crowns from the Cradle Roll, Kindergarten and Primary divisions. Some were also found in the church school office. They were to be used in the 2015 Easter & Christmas play. They ain’t gonna get the ones I gave my granddaughter for her birthday. Listen up, BK-Bah Humbug. Woe is me!!

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