Facebook terms of service inspire fresh draft of GC compliance document

SILVER SPRING, Md. — Recent congressional obsession with Facebook’s extremely lengthy and confusing terms of service has reportedly inspired General Conference officials to produce a fresh draft of the compliance document which they hope will bring all church entities in line with even the weirdest GC policies.

This morning, GC staffers were encouraged to imitate the language of the Facebook terms of service and “optimize for complete and utter confusion in drafting a killer version of the compliance doc.”

GC Compliance Spokesperson Makem Dewitt said that the goal for the new version of the document was to “overwhelm all potential signatories with jargon and legalese to the point where they immediately give up on reading it and just sign already.”

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