SILVER SPRING, Md. — The annual world mission-themed Harvest Festival (Halloween) Costume Party at the General Conference headquarters took an unexpected turn today as a female employee was escorted out of the building for looking “too ordained.”
Stewardship Department Executive Assistant, Mujer Innocente objected to the charge and said that she had not had the time to go look for the kimono she had planned to wear and so had simply come to the party in her usual professional attire.
Lead organizer Manny Olskul rejected Innocente’s explanation, however, claiming that she had deliberately chosen a costume that made her look “too much like leadership material.”
Olskul said, “We’ve just gotten through a very trying summer shooting down female ordination. The last thing we need is someone starting the campaigning once more.”
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Now, that is scary! Disclaimer: to my knowledge, I have no relatives working at the GC, no matter how they spell their name.
CACKLE…..and then they all sang, “Bringing in the sheep.”
Well done, Sevvy. Not your most subtle by a longshot, but very funy. I mean, poor Sister Mujer Innocente… and the harsh Br Manny Oldskul. You sure he is no relative, OldSchool? Ha!
Should have worn a nun’s habit, or a burka.
SHE WAS NOT FEMALE, I CHECKED, ALSO HE IS NOT JEWISH.
She was advised not wear that dougy Batchelor mask so it’s her own fault.
“Olskul said, ‘We’ve just gotten through a very trying summer shooting down female ordination. The last thing we need is someone starting the campaigning once more.’” In view of those old school attitudes, the Scandinavian plan may be the best approach for now: no ordination for anyone. http://www.adventist.no/Adventist/Hjem/Nyheter/2015/September-2015/Adventistkirken-slutter-aa-ordinere#.VjVvHH3RZHP
Even Ben Carson said it was a huge mistake that the GC voted against letting the divisions decide whether to ordain women. “I don’t see any reason why women can’t be ordained,” he said.
I AGREE. I WILL BE HOLDING A MASS FEMALE ORDINATION ON SUNDAY NIGHT AT THE HOLIDAY INN, ROOM 114. FOR THOSE WHO ARE GENDER CONFUSED THERE WILL BE A DOOR PRIZE. HALLELUJA.
MUSIC WILL BE PROVIDED BY SISTERS OF SOAP THAT FLOATS. DONATIONS WILL BE ACCEPTED AS LONG AS IT IS IN CASH.
She can’t look like she’s ordained unless she’s at least 50 lbs overweight with a double chin, in a suit, tie, and white shirt of course.
HEY!! THAT’S ME. TAKE IT BACK, NOT FAIR, I HAVE BEEN SAVED AND SEEN VISIONS.