Adventist leaders bash Trump’s ‘Muslim ban,’ still cool with women’s ordination ban

Trump has called for a ban on Muslims entering the US...
Trump has called for a ban on Muslims entering the US…
SILVER SPRING, Md. — Leaders at the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists were quick to condemn a call for a “total and complete shutdown of Muslims entering the US” by billionaire US presidential candidate Donald Trump.

In a press conference addressing Trump’s appeal, the GC called his words “divisive, backwards and completely ignorant of the incredibly positive contributions of millions of upstanding human beings affected by such discriminatory rhetoric.”

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In response to a reporter’s question about whether the narrowness of Trump’s rhetoric bore any resemblance to church leaders’ stances that led to the “total and complete shutdown of sanctioned women’s ordination,” GC spokesperson Del Uhshanal was careful to point out that the anti-women’s ordination GC San Antonio vote last summer simply barred world divisions of the church from allowing women’s ordination in their regions.

After repeated follow-up questions from the same reporter wanting to know if the net effect of the women’s ordination decision did not boil down to ignoring the “proven ability of upstanding women to make incredibly positive contributions to ministry,” Ushanal discovered an urgent meeting to which he was late.

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20 Comments

  1. STU REDMAN

    THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO WANT ALL NON MUSLIMS TO CONVERT TO MUSLIM OR DIE. THEY ARE THE CANCER WITHIN THEIR COMMUNITY AND RELIGION. THERE IS A GROWING ANTI MUSLIM SENTIMENT HERE IN THE US, NOT BECAUSE OF MUSLIMS IN A GENERAL, BUT RATHER BECAUSE OF THE VIOLENT TERROR VIEW AND ACTIONS THEY TAKE. THEY HATE THE WESTERN CULTURE BUT LOVE OUR MONEY AND GOODS. EXTREME MUSLIM DESIRE TO DO AWAY WITH THE WEST, AMERICANS AND CHRISTIANS. THEY HAVE A LOW TOLERANCE TO ANYTHING “NON MUSLIM”. SO I CAN UNDERSTAND WHY TRUMP WANTS A BAN.

  2. Bonnie Ann Clyde

    Don’t waste your breath — or your ink — trying to get sense into the GC’s head about women’s ordination. Females will always be Second Class Citizens in their book, as long as the GC Papacy remains in power. The Jesuits have infiltrated the GC to high levels, up to and including the presidency. The anti-ordination idea is straight from the Jesuits, as modeled by the first Jesuit Pope, who is dead-set against ordaining women as priests.

  3. Editor

    Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus, and the GC believes God’s doctrine that there is neither male nor female in Christ Jesus. Wink, wink. (Sorry, I’m just trying to make you feel good.)

  4. Hugh Heifer

    Women should not be in the pulpit. Everyone knows they are sex objects and would distract the devout male worshipers. A woman’s place is in the home, barefoot and pregnant (or in the modeling studio with high heels and birth control). If God intended women to be pastors, He would have made them to be born with a clerical collar on their neck and a Bible in their hand. Donald Trump is right about women! Keep them out of the pulpit and put them in the Haystacks-preparation department of the potluck crew.

  5. Ben Carsinogen

    I see no reason why women can’t be ordained. I have made that position clear in interviews, and I will stick by it until I backtrack. Now, everybody forget about these issues that are “much ado about nothing,” and enjoy a tall glass of Martinelli’s Sparkling Cider with a side of Fri-Chik at my Friday night book sales or my Sabbath political campaign events. And don’t forget to vote for Hillary.

  6. Hillarious Clinton

    The cure for the women’s ordination delusion in the GC is to elect a woman as President of the USA. Then Teddy may finally figure out that women aren’t just helpless, useless decorations. They can actually do things — like making long boring speeches and getting face-lifts. In fact, I once saw a lady getting a face-lift. The operation was going well until the crane broke.

  7. Ted Cruise-control

    Donald Dump is a has-been and wanna-be. His charm will soon wear off, and Jeb Butch will rise to the top. Notice I didn’t say “Ted Cruz will rise to the top”. . . . .

  8. Ben-abdul al-Carson

    “If the facts are against you, argue the law. If the law is against you, argue the facts. If both are against you, just shout and pound on the pulpit.”

    If you don’t understand foreign policy, focus on healthcare. If you don’t have any good healthcare proposals, just bash Obamacare. And change your name to Ben Carcinogen.

    If you are a clown with nothing worthwhile to say, change your name to Donald Dump.

    If you pushed the wrong decision on women’s ordination, change your name to the GC Pope.

  9. Richard Mills

    Sounds like the Ismaelites, the Hittites, the Amalkites, the Jebusites, the Amorites, the Levites, the Israelites and all the other “ites” are at it again. When will it all end? My neighborhood is all mixed up. Woe iz me!!

    • Ben Carsinogen

      If you think your neighborhood is mixed up, you should hear one of my speeches–and how I always chastise the liberal left-wing socialist media for having the gall to believe that I actually mean the crazy things that I say.

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