Southern to host Beasts of Revelation-themed Halloween Party

Students are drawing costume inspiration from Revelation beast illustrations like this one...
Students are drawing costume inspiration from Revelation beast illustrations like this one…
COLLEGEDALE, Tenn. — Citing a need to sanitize a downright pagan holiday, Southern Adventist University administrators have announced a Beasts of Revelation-themed Halloween Party.

Officially sponsored by the School of Religion, students have been given near-carte-blanche to “tastefully illustrate” any beast mentioned in the book of Revelation.

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“Some might find this holiday event unsavory but we as North American Adventists have neglected the book of Revelation over the last several decades and it is high time we revived some interest in it,” said New Testament professor, Neerget Tenure, a faculty organizer for the party. “We thought that a creative way to generate conversation about the Bible’s last book was to throw a costume party. Plus, college kids aren’t into vegetarian canned food collection which seems to be the only other sanctioned activity this time of year.”

University administrators insisted that some guidelines be established for the event. One very specific rule forbids any student, staff or faculty member – whether male or female – from dressing as the whore of Babylon.

“She isn’t a beast and even if she were, we have a feeling her outfit would violate our dress code,” said Tenure.

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  1. Fay

    I’m going dressed as Laodicea, wearing my usual Canadian attire: flip-flops, and shorts with a parka. From experience, I already know that they (top end/bottom end) balance each other out, and I will be lukewarm. I will be feeling like a ‘true’ Adventist.

  2. For this party, I would dress up as an underling for the false prophet of Rev 13. I would appear as either a sunglass wearing FBI or Mossad agent, or as a military General in standard uniform on an inspection tour from the Pentagon in charge of keeping Seventh-day Adventists stupefied about false-flag operations.

  3. Ray Kraft

    As the presidency of Dr. Ben Carson nears, surely a sign of the times, the church needs to produce a live action feature film about the End Times and the unholy alliance between America and the Catholic Church to persecute Sabbathkeepers all over the world, starring the Beasts of Revelation in stunning CGI, should bring in a box right up there with Jurassic World!

  4. Richard Mills

    Somebody is going to dress like an angel, like the one that visited the Israelites back in Egypt before the Exodus. Can I come as Uncle Sam in the lamb-like beast? Sounds like fun-fun-fun-fun. Just like Babylon fun! Will the wine be flowing? Woe is me!

  5. 146Dear Hinterlander,I’m glad you found this blog helpful. I encourage you to get in touch with the Evangelism department of the OCA and the Antiochian Archdiocese. In the meantime let’s keep praying that Orthodoxy will grow and flourish in America.Robert

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