Ted Wilson and Dan Jackson to go on 7-day cruise to “work on the relationship”

BFFs: Ted Wilson (left) and Dan Jackson
BFFs: Ted Wilson (left) and Dan Jackson
SILVER SPRING, Md. — Despite reports of tensions between General Conference President, Ted Wilson and North American Division President, Dan Jackson, the two Adventist leaders have issued a statement declaring their commitment to their friendship and their willingness to “do whatever it takes to save a very special relationship.” The statement detailed various options Wilson and Jackson were weighing to “put the spark” back in their relationship. The first of these is a 7-day Caribbean Cruise to help the two officials rekindle their friendship away from the stresses of their Silver Spring-based offices.

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“I am looking forward to our cruise and hope that I can use our time together to talk Dan out of moving the NAD offices out of the GC building. We are better together,” said Wilson, referencing the much-discussed possibility of an NAD office relocation.

“Yeah, I don’t know if we’ll make much progress on that front,” said Jackson, “It’ll be better for everyone if our offices move out and give us some air to breathe.”

The cruise will feature daily counseling that Wilson and Jackson have agreed to attend together. Therapy sessions will focus on constructive communication techniques and active listening. “Dan and I would make so much more progress together if he actually heard me out,” said Wilson who expressed a lot of enthusiasm for “a mediated discussion where Dan can’t just tune me out.”

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Jackson says that he “respectfully disagrees” with Wilson’s assessment of his approach to their relationship. “Ted can’t talk. He means well but seriously, the guy just railroads us lesser mortals with his opinions and if we don’t do what he wants he goes off in a huff and then slashes our budgets. Not cool.”

Both leaders have promised to be positive and approach the cruise with an open-mind. “We are going to approach this cruise with Christian brotherly love,” assured Wilson. “Dan’s not a bad guy. He’ll see the light eventually.”

“Rain or shine, I am personally committed to making the best of our cruise,” said Jackson. “Whether or not Ted plays nice, I’m going to town on those buffets.”


3 Comments

  1. Richard Mills

    Let’s hope they did not book a Carnival Cruise. They might be dropped off in Miami for medical treatment at a local Florida Hospital. Then what? Most cruises do not serve Worthington/Loma Linda veggie food stuff. Maybe a tofu burger with kale smoothie will cure what ails these guys. Woe is me!!

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