In response to decades of complaints from Adventists about potluck line wait times, the denomination has made the decision to roll out food conveyor belts to all its congregations worldwide.
From now on, the faithful will simply take a seat in church fellowship halls and potluck dishes will come to them on a conveyor belt.
The speed of the conveyor belts has been set to very high to ensure that church members that previously have taken forever spooning up portions will be forced to get their act together or lose their chance at sampling.
Pots and other serving dishes will be securely fastened to the conveyor belts to prevent opportunistic members from lifting them off the belt to help themselves to double portions.
Perhaps the best feature of the new conveyor belts is that, after circulating for 28 minutes, dishes are automatically emptied and run through a dishwasher.