Trump Promises To Build Wall Around Adventist Subdivision In Heaven

WASHINGTON, D.C. — As Election Day looms, the Trump and Biden campaigns are appealing to voters of all stripes in an attempt to woo them.

Both candidates are scraping the barrel when it comes to undecided voters and have stooped as low as trying to get Adventists to vote for them.

While former Vice President Joe Biden tried to court Adventists centenarians with an “I’m practically one of you” mailer earlier this year, President Donald Trump has decided to go with a wall promise:

“If Adventists vote for me I promise I’ll build the biggest, most beautiful wall around their subdivision in heaven,” said Trump.

The president added the wall will be “so YUGE they’ll think they are the only ones there.”

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5 Comments

  1. Richard Mills

    Is this the same wall in “Early Writings”. Is this a wall similar to Banner’s recent fundraiser scandal? Which subdivision will have this wall? I want “them” on the other side, Will Trump be using Union workers-like Atlantic, Columbia, Southern, etc.? Maybe ASI volunteers to build? or maybe Maranatha people? Pleeze keep up to date on this important contruction issue. Will any tithe $$$$$$be used? I want to be part of this project.

  2. John Beckett

    A prominent evangelist, after an unhappy discussion with a conference treasurer about how contributions could be used, muttered to a friend that “in Heaven they’ll have a special section.” I think he was trying to process the fact that we don’t always see things the same way. And I hope I can be as charitable when such things arise.

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