WASHINGTON, D.C. — As Election Day looms, the Trump and Biden campaigns are appealing to voters of all stripes in an attempt to woo them. Both candidates are scraping the barrel when it comes to Read more […]
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Foolproof voting tech guaranteed to prevent any kind of foul play or delay in results has been identified to rescue the US general election from voter fraud. The General Read more […]
WASHINGTON, D.C. — US Supreme Court justices have unanimously ruled President Donald Trump needs to come clean on his tithing records. In the decision, justices insisted they want to see Read more […]
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Reporters at today’s White House press briefing were notified that President Donald Trump has taken to exclusively eating haystacks to boost his resistance to COVID-19 infection. In Read more […]
WASHINGTON, D.C. — This evening the Worship Committee of Joyful House Fellowship voted to impeach the congregation’s senior drummer, Des Masiado. The vote brought to a close a months-long Read more […]
USA – Halloween is canceled. President Trump issued an executive order nixing the holiday after hearing enough Adventists make the case for Harvest Festivals. Instead of dressing up in scary costumes Read more […]
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Right on the heels of expressing an interest in “buying” Greenland, US President Donald Trump has asked Adventist volunteer building organization, Maranatha, to develop the Read more […]
WASHINGTON, D.C. — White House staff have confirmed that US President Donald Trump has left the United States for Bobenheim am Berg, a village in the Palatinate, Germany, to which his paternal Read more […]
WASHINGTON DC – US President Donald Trump used his much anticipated 4th of July address to call for unity and reform in how America eats on Independence Day. Speaking above the roar Read more […]
SILVER SPRING, Md. — The Biblical Research Institute announced this morning that three weeks of intense study had led the team to conclude that it was unclear what would come first: the reopening Read more […]
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