Trump selects Pathfinder uniforms for Space Force

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WASHINGTON, D.C. — After much deliberation, President Donald Trump has selected Pathfinder uniforms as the official personnel dress code for the space force he is seeking to launch. The Pathfinder uniforms will be especially adapted for space travel.

White House staff confirmed this morning that seniority in the space force will established by how many honors are featured on the sash of any given officer.

Entrance requirements for space force candidates will include an exhaustive knowledge of cat species; advanced knot-tying protocols and, at the very least, intermediate-level orienteering skills.

Entrance will be denied to any candidate who cannot pitch a tent in the rain or spot Orion in a winter night sky.

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