“Come, Thou Long Expected Conference Session” and Other Very Adventist Hymn Names

Ah, Adventist hymns. The perfect way to lull yourself into a peaceful Sabbath afternoon nap (or get riled up for that evangelistic campaign.) Here are some of our favorite Adventist hymn names (with a little bit of satire thrown in for good measure):

1. “Oh, How I Love Potluck”
2. “Take My Life (And Let Me Only Eat Healthy Foods)”
3. “Amazing Grace (But Have You Tried Our Health Message?)”
4. “Come, Thou Long Expected Conference Session”
5. “Trust and Obey (The GC Leadership)”
6. “Guide Me, O Thou Great White Estate”
7. “Joyful, Joyful, We Adore Potluck (And Our Health Food Store)”
8. “Blessed Assurance (That We’re Better Than Everyone Else)”
9. “There Shall Be Showers of Sermon-Length Prayers”
10. “Rock of Ages (Except on the Sabbath)”
11. “Holy, Holy, Holy (Is the Church Manual)”
12. “Sabbath in the Sanctuary (With a Side of Potluck)”
13. “The Battle Hymn of the Adventist Mom (Against Secular Music)”
14. “I Surrender All (Except My Vegetarianism)”
15. “O Worship the King (But Not Too Loudly or Emotionally)”

And there you have it, folks. The perfect soundtrack for your Sabbath afternoon nap (or potentially awkward church sing-along). Enjoy!

 

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