Developer selling plots to Adventist subdivision in heaven

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HOLLAND, Mich. — Adventist luxury home developer, Chuck Todson of Todson Heavenly Homes, has started selling down payments for 7-room mansions in what he is billing “the most exclusive subdivision in heaven.” Home plot down payments for the all-Adventist community are currently selling for the bargain price of $10,000 each, “well below your average America home down payment in this market,” said the developer.

“Adventists have always been a people set apart. I don’t see that changing,” said Todson, who is guaranteeing all buyers that their future neighborhood will be “more Adventist than Collegedale, Berrien Springs and parts of Loma Linda put together.”

Todson’s efforts have brought him tremendous success. “Adventists think this is the best thing since FriChik,” said Todson, pointing to 144 plots he has sold so far as evidence.

Todson tailors his marketing approach to the brand of Adventist he detects in each prospective customer. “To some Adventists who have a narrower view, I don’t even bother saying it’s a subdivision because they literally aren’t expecting anyone else to turn up.”

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  1. Ima Peakay

    I don’t want a mansion in heaven. They are too big, and I’ll bet they don’t supply me with a servant angel to sweep the floors. Lord knows my husband won’t do it. Nope. I either want a small condo or I’m not showing up. Most people I’ve known who live in mansions are arrogant jerks anyway, and if heaven is full of those people, I’ll be having beers and playing poker you-know-where.

    1. Dave

      Just keep doing what I do here; visit others (friends, relatives, friends of relatives, relatives of friends…) and stay with them! Eat their food, sleep in their beds, watch their cable, use their internet, it’s great! And they all envy your ‘carefree’ lifestyle! So why change in Heaven?

  2. Fay

    would like a mere cabin…..hate stuff, even heavenly stuff. No fencing; I want to have it so that the winged babies that Ellen saw, being free to flit in and out of my yard

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