Musk Backs Out of Twitter Deal After Discovering Church Lobbies Much Better for Spreading Gossip

BOCA CHICA, Texas — Billionaire Elon Musk has backed out of his commitment to buy social media platform Twitter after discovering that a far better way to share gossip has existed for decades. “Turns Read more […]

Adventists called to be like Buddy in Elf: In the world but not of it

ADVENTIST WORLD — Adventists everywhere are being urged by their denomination to watch or re-watch the movie Elf  this Christmas. The reason? The main character, Buddy (played by Will Ferrell), Read more […]

Adventist wilderness bunkers selling like crazy after North Korean nuclear test

THE WOODS — Since the latest North Korean nuclear test, Adventist wilderness bunkers have turned into the hottest properties on the real estate market. Previously the exclusive obsession Read more […]

Report: Fights over potluck remnants threaten to fracture Remnant

SILVER SPRING, Md. — Escalating tensions within the Adventist Church are the subject of a new report which claims that fights over potluck remains are in danger of fracturing the denomination. “Our Read more […]