COLLEGEDALE, Tenn. — Doug Digger breathed a sigh of satisfaction from his ivory tower balcony today as he released what he called a “wrinkle-free” version of the Bible. In the run-up to the release, Read more […]
BREAKING NEWS: Legalists across the Adventist world were rushed to hospital today after sustaining panic attacks at the unwelcome report from leading denominational theologians that non-Adventists Read more […]
Church lobbies can be perilous places if you walk into them without a solid game plan. BarelyAdventist has compiled the following definitive list of people you merely murmur “Happy Sabbath” to while Read more […]
BOCA CHICA, Texas — Billionaire Elon Musk has backed out of his commitment to buy social media platform Twitter after discovering that a far better way to share gossip has existed for decades. “Turns Read more […]
Joy can be found in many things, in many places.
These are not those things. These are not those places. Read more [...]Adventist World — Recent social distancing guidelines imposed on populations around the world have come as music to the ears of countless Adventists who were already remarkably skilled at “us Read more […]
HEAVEN – Construction angels have been working overtime lately as an ultra-exclusive gated community in heaven takes shape. The subdivision will only house Adventists and is being built so Read more […]
COLLEGEDALE, Tenn.— Tensions are running at an all-time high at Strident Lane Adventist Church as a lawsuit over the disputed rights to a popular church pew, comes to a boil. At the center Read more […]
LOS ANGELES, Calif. — Although Bo Ludo has, for years, complained that he is being persecuted for his Adventist faith, a source with (painful) knowledge of his overall situation has confirmed Read more […]
ADVENTIST WORLD — Adventists everywhere are being urged by their denomination to watch or re-watch the movie Elf this Christmas. The reason? The main character, Buddy (played by Will Ferrell), Read more […]
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