
Picture This: 11 Adventist Buzzkills

Adventist World — Recent social distancing guidelines imposed on populations around the world have come as music to the ears of countless Adventists who were already remarkably skilled at “us Read more […]
HEAVEN – Construction angels have been working overtime lately as an ultra-exclusive gated community in heaven takes shape. The subdivision will only house Adventists and is being built so Read more […]
COLLEGEDALE, Tenn.— Tensions are running at an all-time high at Strident Lane Adventist Church as a lawsuit over the disputed rights to a popular church pew, comes to a boil. At the center Read more […]
LOS ANGELES, Calif. — Although Bo Ludo has, for years, complained that he is being persecuted for his Adventist faith, a source with (painful) knowledge of his overall situation has confirmed Read more […]
ADVENTIST WORLD — Adventists everywhere are being urged by their denomination to watch or re-watch the movie Elf this Christmas. The reason? The main character, Buddy (played by Will Ferrell), Read more […]
ADVENTIST WORLD — A heated disagreement over how to pronounce the word “Adventist” has led Adventists on either side of the argument to stop speaking to each other. Those convinced that the Read more […]
THE WOODS — Since the latest North Korean nuclear test, Adventist wilderness bunkers have turned into the hottest properties on the real estate market. Previously the exclusive obsession Read more […]
SILVER SPRING, Md. — Escalating tensions within the Adventist Church are the subject of a new report which claims that fights over potluck remains are in danger of fracturing the denomination. “Our Read more […]
EVERYWHERE — After an insane night of discount sparklers, veggie meat platters and non-alcoholic toasts, Adventists grogilly greeted the first daylight of 2019 with throbbing Martinelli’s hangovers. Early Read more […]
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