Monday, June 23, 2025

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Adornment

Nobody Believes That is the Pastor’s Real Hair

Last Sabbath, Oakville SDA’s Pastor Mike showed up to deliver his sermon sporting a full head of hair that appeared virtually overnight. While the pastor insists it's all natural,...
Adornment

Parents That ‘Can’t Afford’ Adventist Schooling For Kids Drive Off In BMW

A pair of parents who've been singing the "we can't afford Adventist schooling" tune for years, were observed cruising away from church last Saturday...
Adornment

Blockbuster Sequel To Feature Barbie Training For Medical Mission at Loma Linda

LOMA LINDA, Calif. — Following the roaring success of her summer blockbuster hit, studio bosses promise Barbie will soon back with a whole new...
Adornment

Pastor Saša Gunjević First Adventist Pastor To Maintain Credentials After Wearing Non-Regulation Socks

Pastor Sasha Gunjević of Hamburg-Grindelberg Adventist Church has made international Adventist headlines lately for sporting non-regulation socks during his sermons. The pastor is the...
Adornment

How to Spot When an Adventist is Bragging

We Adventists like to at least appear humble. But once in a while some status signaling happens. You know an Adventist is bragging when...
Adornment

GC: Posting Selfies With Filters is “Bearing False Witness”

SILVER SPRING, Md. — The General Conference is cracking down on members using forgiving filters to enhance their selfies.  “Filters are basically Instagram makeup,” said...
Adornment

Miss Universe Pageant To Be Judged Solely On Inner Beauty

NEW YORK CITY, N.Y. --- Officials have announced that the next Miss Universe beauty pageant will be judged solely on the quality of contestants'...
Adornment

White Estate Releases “What Would Ellen Do?” Bracelets

SILVER SPRING, Md. --- The Ellen G. White Estate has released a line of "What Would Ellen Do?" (WWED) bracelets aimed at reminding Adventists...
Adornment

Kylie Jenner releases line of Adventist-approved “SabbathLipstick”

LOS ANGELES, Calif. --- Fast on her way to billionairedom, reality star  entrepreneur Kylie Jenner has opened yet another line in her cosmetics empire:...

BarelyAdventist is a satire and humor blog focused on Adventist culture and issues. Written by committed Adventists, the goal is to foster growth within the faith community through lighthearted conversation and humor, avoiding soapboxing or angry rants. The blog is not officially endorsed by the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists.

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