10 Reactions You Get When You Say You Are Seventh-day Adventist

1. The Cult Crusader: “Wait, Seventh-day Adventist? Isn’t that a cult?” They immediately start searching for the nearest exit, fearing you might try to indoctrinate them into your secret society Read more […]

Why Old School Liberals Are Irrelevant to Young Adventists

#NOTsatire Attempting to pitch old school liberal Adventist views to today’s young Adventists is a bit like trying to convince them that dial-up internet is the future of connectivity. It’s Read more […]

Headstrong Member Crushed to Hear Church Has Room For Guy That Doesn’t Agree With Him

In a stunning blow to his ego, super-opinionated church member Chad Righteous was devastated to hear that his church has room for a guy that doesn’t agree with his theology. “I’m literally Read more […]

South England Conference Delegates Ace Surprise Quiz On Machiavelli’s ‘The Prince’

In a daring departure from the traditional agenda of hymn-singing, lining up to argue at mics and dramatically sending newly-recommended leadership names back to committee, organizers of this weekend’s Read more […]

How to Argue Adventist-Style and Win (or at Least Come Out with Your Dignity Intact)

Whether we’re discussing new church carpet colors or the intricacies of the Investigative Judgment, we Adventists can disagree with each other pretty strongly from time to time. So, if you’re Read more […]

Slacker Church Parking Volunteer Hasn’t Done Job In Months

This guy literally hasn’t done a thing in months. While he used to self-importantly stride around the church parking lot on Sabbath mornings, all he does these days is just smile and wave on Read more […]

Is paying for something OK on Sabbath if you call it a donation? Adventists speak up.

  Is paying for something OK on Sabbath if you call it a donation? Some Adventists speak up: Spencer Spendthrift, ABC Store Personal Shopper “It all depends. If a legit Adventist Read more […]

How long should altar calls last? (Adventists Speak Up)

  Altar calls are a time-honored and time-consuming evangelistic tradition that Adventist feel strongly about. How long should they last? Some Adventists speak up: Juan Lentisimo, Read more […]