Survey: Most Adventists Don’t Actually Know What They Believe (But They’re Sure Everyone Else is Wrong)

A recent survey conducted among Adventists has revealed a surprising trend: many members of the faith aren’t entirely sure about what they believe. Despite this uncertainty, they remain steadfastly Read more […]

Local Church Discovers Love is More Important Than Actually Knowing Stuff About the Bible

BREAKING NEWS: In a groundbreaking theological discovery, a local Adventist church has unveiled a revolutionary approach to faith: ditch the doctrine, embrace the feels! Yes, you read that Read more […]

New Member Can’t Find Where Jesus Lays Out 28 Fundamentals

STOCKHOLM, Sweden – New member Anna Borttappad opened her Bible this morning, looking to brush up on doctrine. After the flurry of scripture hopping she’d gone through during her baptismal Read more […]