US Army Stocks Up On Deadly Mustard

PENTAGON — In an effort to modernize its arsenal, the US Military has placed a gargantuan order of deadly mustard.

“I guarantee our enemies have never thought of this simple but lethal solution to national defense,” said military analyst, Ed Heinz. 

“America is safer as a result of the decision we make today,” said Heinz, praising the move to order enough crates of the devastating condiment to fully flavor weaponized hotdogs for years to come.


SPONSORED LINKS

You’ve had your fix of satire. Now head over to Adventist Today for current events updates, analysis and opinion on all things Adventist.

.

(Visited 49 times, 1 visits today)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *