Trump Calls On America To “Give Big Franks A Try On The 4th Of July”

 

WASHINGTON DC – US President Donald Trump used his much anticipated 4th of July address to call for unity and reform in how America eats on Independence Day.

Speaking above the roar of jets flying overhead, the president called on all Americans, regardless of party or culinary persuasion, to “Give Big Franks a try on the 4th of July.”

Addressing the huge crowd assembled on National Mall, Trump surprised supporters and critics alike by saying that, after tasting Big Franks last week, he was going “completely Worthington vegan” on top of having sworn off alcohol decades ago.

“Ben Carson is so proud of me,” said Trump. “Says I’m halfway Adventist.”


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