Wednesday, December 11, 2024

Vegetarianism

Loma Linda Scientists Create Vegan Substitute So Realistic, Vegans Refuse to Eat It

Researchers at Loma Linda University's School of Public Health have unveiled a new vegan substitute so convincing that even die-hard vegans are questioning their life choices. Dr. Mia Plantlover, lead...

Adventist Veggie Meat Alternatives Now 100% Indistinguishable From Cardboard

LOMA LINDA, Calif. - NEWSTART Foods announced today that after years of research and development, their line of vegetarian meat substitutes has achieved complete...

Member Who Brought Actual Chicken to Church Potluck Suddenly VIP

At Eden Springs Adventist Church’s potluck, local church pianist Kay F Cee’s decision to break the vegetarian tradition by bringing actual chicken won her...

Loma Linda University releases tick that makes you vegetarian

LOMA LINDA, Calif. --- A team of Adventist ultravegetarians, some random hikers and several senior Loma Linda University biologists have successfully engineered a tick...

US News and World Report Declares Southern Best College to Find Vegetarian Spouse

Collegedale, Tenn. --- For the first time ever, US News and World Report has ranked schools in view of their ability to provide students...

Turkeys Urge Americans Not To Travel For Thanksgiving

  UNITED STATES —— Turkeys across the United States have warned Americans of the extreme dangers of traveling for Thanksgiving this year. “Don’t risk your health...

Stuck Inside All Day? Watch Union College Students Try Veggie Meat Uncooked Straight Out Of The Can

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=EZghRrxbPsE&feature=youtu.be#dialog Thanks to the Union College Communication Program for letting us share this stomach-churning video! SPONSORED LINKS You've had your fix of satire. Now head over to...

Ben Carson Begs Adventists To Stop Panic Buying Stripples

WASHINGTON, D.C. --- Former neurosurgeon Dr. Ben Carson has a special message for Adventists during the coronavirus crisis. The Adventist member of President Trump's...

Adventist Scientists Forced To Disclose Religious Affiliation Before Recommending Stripples

LOMA LINDA, Calif. --- The American Dietary Association claims that Adventist scientists are allowing their religious bias to color their nutritional recommendations. The ADA is...

Sam’s Chicken Earns Andrews Cafeteria A Michelin Star

BERRIEN SPRINGS, Mich. --- In an absolute first for an Adventist institution, the Andrews University cafeteria has been awarded a Michelin star in recognition...

Trump Calls On America To “Give Big Franks A Try On The 4th Of July”

  WASHINGTON DC - US President Donald Trump used his much anticipated 4th of July address to call for unity and reform in how America...