US News and World Report Declares Southern Best College to Find Vegetarian Spouse

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Collegedale, Tenn. — For the first time ever, US News and World Report has ranked schools in view of their ability to provide students with “a high chance of finding a vegetarian to marry.”

US News ranked Southern Adventist University as first in the nation for the new category, with other Adventist schools filling out the Top 10 colleges in the listing.

The publication said Southern’s “picturesque campus, courtship culture and theology majors virtually guaranteed vegetarians finding love, often in the prayer garden.”

Coincidentally, Southern was also ranked as the school most likely to graduate Little Debbie addicts.


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