Sold exclusively as a set and fully sanctioned by the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists, the accessory box consists of a full-color Beast of Revelation tie, Pathfinder cuff links and a pocket square boldly imprinted with the denominational logo.
“I will be greatly disappointed, to say the very least, if they run out of stock before I get my dad his beast tie,” said Adventist shopper Decepscio Nado, waiting outside his local ABC store in Glendale, California. “And those Pathfinder cuff links are the perfect way to thank him for being Pathfinder drill sergeant all those years.”
Price seems to be no object for the eager Adventists. “$18.44 is a small price to pay for such a fun way to bare your Adventism,” said Elena de Blanca. “They should start doing red dresses with Adventist logos for Mother’s Day. Ellen White would totally have approved.”
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I’m going to be bringing out a full line of SDA Apparel, everything, socks, shoes, pants, shirts, blouses, dresses, coats, jackets, sweaters, hat, ties of course, cuf links, brooches, scarves, everything for all occasions, casual and formal, sportswear and churchwear and workwear and nightwear, so no Adventist ever has to dress in worldly clothes again.
Can’t wait to see your SDA Lingerie catalog featuring models covered from head to toe in the “dress reform nightie.”
Hey, Florence-Could this “dress reform nighty” be sold in Victoria Secret stores? Maybe modeled? I all excited about this item!! No more woe iz me on this topic.
Good name for the ABC shopper, “Decepcio Nado.” Yup, he will be sorely “disappointed” if he finds the shelves empty. But when they restock, the ABC could run an “after-Father’s Day” sale of the same merchandise for 50% off. It would be great all those procrastinators and belated gift-givers.
Gotta love the Mark of the Beast tie. Awesome fashion!
“$18.44 is a small price to pay for such a fun way to bare your Adventism,” said Elena de Blanca.That name seems strangely familiar, and so does the price. . . .
Anything published or manufactured by any company other than Pacific Press, is secular, worldly, and dangerous. “Touch not the unclean thing!” So glad the ABC and Ray’s new SDA Apparel line are coming to the rescue along with McKee’s health cookies.
“They should start doing red dresses with Adventist logos for Mother’s Day. Ellen White would totally have approved.” Sorry, sevvy, the White Estate Snopes division has said the red-dress statement was directed to “some women, but not to all.” The rest have to wear black.
Navy blue will do in a pinch.
News Break: As the church degenerates more and more into Babylon, the ABC will soon carry an “SDA pørn” magazine featuring women in spaghetti-strap blouses and skirts that come 1/2″ above the knee.
The most liberal or worldly SDA models may also wear slacks in the winter.
I like the Adventist-logo pocket hanky, but the Bible says the true church is Baptist: “In those days John the Baptist came, preaching in the wilderness.” (Matt. 3:1.)
THATS RIGHT
When I become President, I will make every U.S. Soldier wear the full-color Beast of Revelation Tie. It will scare the hëll out of the enemy. It will be tremendous! Yuge!
I’m already quaking in my boots, practically want to puke.
As Bill would say, “I tried a couple of SDA cuff links and some Little Debbies a time or two, but I did not inhale.”
On a serious note — and better than sporting SDA clothes — consider this scenario: A flower delivery guy approaches a hooker in a seedy part of town and hands her a beautiful bouquet of roses. He says: “Someone who loves you sent these for you.” On the vase, she sees a tag: “With Love from God, via your friends the Adventists.” I believe I read something like that in the Review last year.
Thanks, now go back to the kitchen and finish my pie
The logo looks better in rainbow colors!
WHATEVER
New Flash- I have been wearing SDA clothing for years. That beast thing? My wife says, “You look like a beast in that Nehru shirt!” My socks have been “Holey” for quite sometime. My other girl friends tell me ,”Richie-You look like a beast in those tight pants & sporty shirts. Who is your fashion designer?” See, I am way ahead of the game!! I even have two Biblical ties featuring Noah & the Ark and a Nativity scene. WOW iz me!! Let’s get in WalMart!!
Richard, how dare I find out about these “other girlfriends” on this blog. You should have told me to my face! Get the hence! WOE IZ THEE!