Bad Driver’s Guardian Angel On Stress Leave


HEAVEN — After enduring several traffic close calls this week due to the horrendous driving of his 25-year-old protectee, guardian angel Passencius filed for stress leave this morning.

“Brad is an absolutely nightmare,” said the exasperated Passencius, adding that not even Sabbath provided a break from Brad’s incessant speeding and irredeemable lack of lane discipline because he is always late for church and “drives like a fallen angel only to arrive five minutes into the sermon each week.”

Passencius told Angelic HR that he would not be able to return to the job until well after GC Session as Brad takes GC votes very personally and is likely to ignore his blind spots for the entire week of meetings.

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