Santa Sick Of Adventists Telling Kids He’s Not Real

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NORTH POLE: Santa Claus spent today fuming about Adventist efforts to persuade kids he doesn’t exist.

“It’s hard enough to deliver presents with COVID complicating everything,” Santa complained to a workroom of elves, “I don’t know why the Adventists have to wet blanket my gig every year.”

Santa said his efforts to complain to the General Conference about Adventist smear campaigns had fallen on deaf ears: “They just reply saying they don’t yet have a world division that handles polar territory.”



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