Saturday, January 18, 2025

Loma Linda OK with taking arm and leg as tuition

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LOMA LINDA, Calif. — Ever the innovators, financial administrators of Loma Linda University School of Medicine have decided to help students struggling to pay their tuition in exchange for the donation of the broke student’s least favorite arm and leg.

“We get it, med school can be expensive and not everyone is able or willing to apply for student loans,” said Student Finance Representative Plata Ahora. “At Loma Linda we want to work with our students to find ways to make medical school more affordable while ensuring that our labs are well stocked with practice material.”

Given the exchange of actual limbs for tuition money, Ahora says that the medical school’s marketers have discarded typical fiancial-aid speak about giving students “a leg up” or “a helping hand.” Ahora shared that the marketers themselves admit that “the mechanics of the arrangement quite clearly mandate that we do the opposite.”

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