Theology Major Prays For Return Of Banquets
RIVERSIDE, Calif. – La Sierra University theology major, Joe Sayido, has spent much of the New Year in earnest prayer for a return to favorable pastor’s wife hunting conditions. At the top Read more […]
Category: Dating
Adventist “Leave Room For The Holy Spirit” Rule Catches On During Coronavirus Outbreak
WORLD — The old school Adventist rule stipulating that people dating each other should “leave room for the Holy Spirit” (keep a healthy distance from each other) has caught on all around the Read more […]
Share this:
Andrews Seminarian Convinced He Is Predestined For Marriage
BERRIEN SPRINGS, Mich. — Seasoned Andrews seminarian Amo Reterno, put a brave face on Valentines this year, certain that love was bound to come knocking in time for a pre-graduation engagement. Despite Read more […]
Share this:
NAD Launches Department Of Adventist Dating
COLUMBIA, Md. — Citing a record number of complaints from single Adventists claiming they have no romantic prospects at their local church, the North American Division recently opened the world’s Read more […]
Share this:
Loma Linda Blood Test Determines If Couples Are Equally Yoked
BREAKING NEWS LOMA LINDA, Calif. — An interdisciplinary team of researchers at Loma Linda University announced today that they have perfected a blood test that can tell, without a shadow Read more […]
Share this:
Adventist Church Introduces “Searching Singles Sanctuary Seating”
ADVENTIST WORLD — In an effort to encourage equal yoking, Adventist churches worldwide are introducing Searching Singles Sanctuary Seating. The hope is that like-minded single Adventists will Read more […]
Share this:
Global “Pray for Hotter Single Men at Church Sabbath” Launched
ADVENTIST WORLD — Next Saturday has been designated Global Pray for Hotter Single Men at Church Sabbath. The special designation comes after decades of complaints that single men at church Read more […]
Share this:
Top Adventist pick-up lines revealed
ADVENTIST WORLD — Adventist leaders recently ordered a survey of the most effective pick-up lines among young adult church-goers. The top responses are listed below: 17. Let’s go read how Read more […]
Share this:
Hot new church visitors are answers to everyone’s prayers
ORLANDO, Fla. — Countless prayers were answered this Sabbath morning as a group of hot strangers walked into Lonely Souls church just in time for the meet n’ greet. Thanking God for ending Read more […]
Share this:
Adventist preacher introductions must clarify whether visiting speaker is single or taken
SILVER SPRING, Md. — Adventist congregations around the world have been ordered to provide what church administrators call a “vital morsel of information” about visiting preachers. Any such Read more […]
