Thursday, May 21, 2026

South American Division of Seventh-day Adventists offers job to suspended Brazilian President Rousseff

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quite the transition...
quite the transition…

BRAZILIA, Brazil — Aides of suspended Brazilian president Dilma Rousseff confirmed this morning that she has received a job offer from the South American Division (SAD) of Seventh-day Adventists. If Rousseff accepts the offer she will head up the division’s Media and Communication Department.

Rousseff has been suspended from office while the Brazilian Senate considers charges that she illegally manipulated government accounts. Analysts are divided on whether she will regain the presidency.

SAD spokesperson Muito Improvável said that despite the current political turmoil surrounding Rousseff, she had many notable qualities. “She has decades of media experience and clearly is a powerful and charismatic storyteller. Plus she looks good on a TV screen,” said Improvável. “We don’t have a lot of females in leadership so this would be groundbreaking for us.”

Although Rousseff has not officially commented on the SAD job offer, she is reportedly weighing a number of factors. “We realize there would be significant adjustments involved in accepting this offer,” said Improvável. “For starters, she’s likely to end up with a camp meeting speaking appointment while the rest of the country celebrates Carnaval.”

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