Tuesday, January 14, 2025

Adventist home from college absolutely sick of the gift of singleness

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PARADISE, Calif. — Just back from college yesterday, Walla Walla junior engineering major Solo Fide caught up with hometown friends and hoped against all hope that the gift of singleness would not be bestowed upon him this Christmas.

Third-wheeling around town, Fide entertained the distant possibility that this year’s Christmas Eve would bring with it a Sabbath miracle in the form of someone very single and very cute to brighten up the church lobby.

Sandwiched between two radiant and newly-engaged friends from childhood, Fide carefully went through the list of church members that might have attractive relatives visiting this Christmas.

Mentally girding himself for a church lobby flirtathon, Fide told himself there was an outside chance that come Christmas Day he would not have to explain how, after three years at Walla Walla, he was still single.


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