Congregation Instructed to Sing “Bring Ye All the Tithes Into The Storehouse” Until Offering Basket Has Enough For New Air Conditioner

In a move of desperation last Sabbath, Pastor Johnson of the Swelter Valley Seventh-day Adventist Church directed his congregation to sing “Bring Ye All the Tithes Into The Storehouse” until the Read more […]

Billion-Copy Great Controversy Distribution Now Happening Via Email Due to Soaring Printing Costs

SILVER SPRING, Md. — Change of plans: ballooning inflation has meant that the printing of the billion Great Controversy copies that were supposed to be distributed across the globe, has been scrapped Read more […]

Adventist Keyboard Manufacturer Solves Tithing Problem

SILVER SPRING, Md. – Previously drooping tithing totals around the world have shot up 144 % thanks to the arrival of the first Adventist-made keyboard from Silver Spring, Maryland-based Stew W. Read more […]