Adventist Church sanctions outreach tattoos

Baring his Adventism...
Baring (or bearing) his Adventism…
SILVER SPRING, Md. — In an historic shift of tattoo policy, the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists has sanctioned the use of ‘outreach tattoos.’

In a press release this morning, the GC stressed that acceptable tattoos should portray the church in a positive light “and be large enough to be legible, leaving no room for confusion in the eye of the beholder.”

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Members wishing to get an approved outreach tattoo are requested to run the intended tattoo design past their local pastor for a second opinion before incurring the cost and considerable physical discomfort of the procedure said GC Director of Adornment Policing, Reemove Ahl.

Ahl added that anyone wishing to sport the official SDA logo in a tattoo would need to have it done at the GC headquarters where a whole third-floor wing has been dedicated to “cutting edge outreach efforts.”


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  1. richard mills

    What if I told you I know a guy who has the 2300 day chart tattooed on his back? He witnessed at the beach by lying on his stomach. Strollers can observe the chart as they go by. Neat? Or What? Woe iz me!!

  2. richard mills

    Let me tell you of another guy I know who tattooed the Daniel 2 image-head of gold, his breast & arms were covered in silver. His belly & thighs were covered in brass. The legs were covered with iron filings. All he did was mix his feet into the wet sand and he recreates the image of Daniel 2. He too, lies on the beach and can roll over at any time the sun it too much. There is no stone to crush the image. The incoming tide will take care of that. I know a lot of tattoo people. 10 Commandments. The Red Sea. The Good Samaritan. The beasts of Revelation. No end of subject matter here. I ‘ve invited a few of them to the 2020 GC Conference. Check out our booth.

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