SILVER SPRING, Md. --- In an historic shift of tattoo policy, the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists has sanctioned the use of 'outreach tattoos.'
In a press release this morning, the GC stressed that acceptable tattoos should portray the church in a positive light "and be large enough to be legible, leaving no room for confusion in the eye of the beholder."
Members wishing to get an approved outreach tattoo are requested to run the intended tattoo design past their local pastor for a second opinion before incurring the cost and considerable physical discomfort of the procedure said GC Director of Adornment Policing, Reemove Ahl.
Ahl added that anyone wishing to sport the official SDA logo in a tattoo would need to have it done at the GC headquarters where a whole third-floor wing has been dedicated to "cutting edge outreach efforts."