SILVER SPRING, Md. --- "United in Sexism," the new slogan for the Seventh-day Adventist Church, was voted in by a massive majority at the denomination's Annual Council Tuesday.
Due for rollout in 2017, the slogan narrowly beat out a close contender, Total Member Sexism, a version leaders thought sounded too much like the church's current rallying cry, Total Member Involvement.
Leaders meeting at the church's Annual Council released a statement warning that the rest of the world was watching closely to see how the church lives out the gospel:
"If we don't take a principled stand against recognizing women for anything other than their absolutely vital role in potluck prep, we could be accused of not bowing to centuries of man-made discrimination against women."
The Pacific Union and Columbia Union have a whole year before the slogan goes live in 2017 to repent and stop treating women fairly as ordained ministers, equal in the Lord's service, said GC spokesperson Ehn Serio.
"We need unity more than ever and that can only happen when we unite against women, not just with our lips but in our hearts."
The Pacific Union has already responded to the news by suggesting an alternate church slogan: Haystacks "R" Us.
Special thanks to BarelyAdventist reader J.A. for the help with this story.