When people leave Adventism, many describe something unexpected: relief.
Not bitterness. Not rebellion. Relief.
Relief from constant self-monitoring. Relief from the low-grade anxiety of never quite measuring up. Relief from having to translate every doubt into a moral failure. Relief from feeling like salvation was always one misstep away from review.
That should stop us cold.
Instead, we rush to explain it away. They wanted an easier path. They were deceived. They didn’t want truth badly enough. These explanations are comforting because they protect the system. They allow us to dismiss the feeling without examining its source.
But relief is data.
People don’t usually feel relieved when they walk away from something that was giving them life. They feel grief. They feel loss. Relief suggests that something felt heavy—constraining—perhaps even spiritually exhausting.
And here’s the uncomfortable question: why does leaving a church that claims to preach “good news” so often feel like laying down a burden?
We are quick to talk about persecution in the last days. We are less willing to ask why so many experience freedom on the way out now.
Even more telling is how we respond when former members try to explain this. We don’t listen. We correct. We theologize. We warn the faithful not to read too much.
Because listening might require us to admit that some of our distinctives—however sincerely held—have been carrying unintended weight.
The gospel should produce rest before it demands endurance.
If departure brings relief, perhaps the question isn’t why they left.
It’s why staying felt so heavy.
❤️❤️❤️
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