“Ghostbusters” producers sue Adventist Church for ghost-denying State of the Dead doctrine

Who you gonna call?
Who you gonna call?
LOS ANGELES, Calif. — Producers of the new Columbia Pictures cinematic release Ghostbusters have filed a lawsuit against the Seventh-day Adventist Church claiming that it promotes doctrines that threaten the commercial success of the film.

Studio spokesperson Diadel Muerte stressed that Adventist interpretations of the State of the Dead are a “major buzz kill” as the idea of dead people being asleep and returning to dust is anything but a cinematic thrill.

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Given the Adventist penchant for tract distribution and other forms of proselytization, Muerte said that more than just current Adventists may be dissuaded from seeing the Columbia Pictures film.

“The Adventist Church’s stance on death flies in the face of the idea of ghosts,” said Muerte. “They basically bust ghosts before our amazing cast can even get to them.”

Muerte said that unless the denomination is silenced, the answer to the question, “Who you gonna call?” will be “The Adventists.”

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  1. Studio spokesperson “Diadel Muerte” has a good name for anyone involved with ghost movies. His “Day of the Dead” name reminds me of the old radio character Digger O’Dell, the friendly undertaker who promised, “I’ll be the last one to let you down.”

    • Bill Murray

      This was a very, very sad, sorry stupid movie put out by holly wood to placate the feminazi of this country. They should be sued. This whole equality business is getting out of hand.

  2. Joe King

    People die; marriages die. I finally realized that my marriage was dead when I read the 20th anniversary card from my wife. It said: “To whom it may concern: . . . .”

    • Hilarious Clinton

      That’s why I say: “Till death do us part” actually means “till the death of the marriage does us part.” Of course, some couples stay together just for convenience or expedience.

      • Burny Colonel Sanders

        Women can have a memorizing effect on men, as Samson learned the hard way when Delilah “used” him to get secrets for the Philistines — and Samson fell for her, like a fool. Men need to stop being like dogs, and stop falling for the wiles of women. Every woman (except my mother and my 1st grade teacher) is a tricky, conniving schemer. Beware! Some men just can’t ever learn. “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.” As the Apostle Paul warned, it’s better to be single and steer clear of those conniving females.

        • Hugh Heiffer

          Don’t judge all women the same. Just because she’s a female, doesn’t mean she’s a woman. It could be a wolf in women’s clothing. But I think you’re right 99% of the time. As Paul the Epistle said, “It is better to burn than to marry.” Stay away from the Siren’s seductive lure of danger.

    • Jim E. Carter

      My grandfather shared with me the following advice. He said, “When your grandmother and I got married we agreed that she would make all the small decisions and I would make all the big decisions. Well, we’ve been married for over 60 years and there hasn’t been a BIG decision yet!”

  3. The SDA church is engaging in anti-competitive behavior against ghost movies.. They better watch out – since they are a registered corporation in the USA – they can’t just destroy the investments of other corporations… Better to say that their belief is a metaphor…

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