When the church makes space—intentionally or quietly—for misogynistic ideas, the damage runs far deeper than we often realize.
This isn’t just about fringe internet subcultures. It shapes how young people understand themselves, God, and one another.
It weakens the emotional and spiritual fabric of Adventist life—and in some cases, it contributes to isolation, despair,
and suicidal thinking.
We see it in purity culture that places disproportionate responsibility on girls for managing male desire, while often
failing to give boys the emotional, relational, and spiritual tools they need to understand their own sexuality.
We see it in rigid, overly dogmatic teachings on headship, gender roles, and “biblical coordination” that refuse to adapt
to modern realities or human complexity. We see it when questioning these systems is treated as rebellion rather than faithfulness.
When women are framed primarily as temptations to be managed and men primarily as leaders—without equal emphasis on
mutuality, vulnerability, and accountability—we don’t cultivate holiness. We cultivate shame, anger, entitlement,
and loneliness. Young men raised in these environments are often left without models of healthy intimacy or emotional
expression. Young women learn to shrink themselves, spiritualize harm, or quietly leave.
The gospel tells a different story. Before God, our worth is not gendered. Authority is not the same as maturity, and
submission is not the same as love. Jesus consistently disrupted systems that confused power with righteousness.
If we want to raise strong, empathetic, responsible men, we must begin by examining how we speak about—and how we treat—our women.
This isn’t culture war. It’s discipleship.
If this post made you uncomfortable, thoughtful, or relieved—you’re exactly who BarelyAdventist is for.
BarelyAdventist exists to name the things many Adventists feel but were never given language for.
We take faith seriously enough to critique the systems that harm people in God’s name—especially when silence would be easier.
If you value honest conversations about faith, power, gender, mental health, and belonging—and you want to help make
space for others who are barely holding on—consider becoming a patron.
Your support doesn’t just fund posts. It protects independence. It creates room for nuance.
It helps keep this conversation alive for people who feel unseen, unheard, or pushed to the margins.
