Adornment
Things Adventists Will Happily Drop Big Money On
Adventists are usually the kind of people who think long and hard before making a purchase. We’re the coupon-clipping, veggie-meat–buying, “do we really need the deluxe Pathfinder sash?” kind...
Adornment
Nobody Believes That is the Pastor’s Real Hair
Last Sabbath, Oakville SDA’s Pastor Mike showed up to deliver his sermon sporting a full head of hair that appeared virtually overnight. While the...
Adornment
Parents That ‘Can’t Afford’ Adventist Schooling For Kids Drive Off In BMW
A pair of parents who've been singing the "we can't afford Adventist schooling" tune for years, were observed cruising away from church last Saturday...
Adornment
Blockbuster Sequel To Feature Barbie Training For Medical Mission at Loma Linda
LOMA LINDA, Calif. — Following the roaring success of her summer blockbuster hit, studio bosses promise Barbie will soon back with a whole new...
Adornment
Pastor Saša Gunjević First Adventist Pastor To Maintain Credentials After Wearing Non-Regulation Socks
Pastor Sasha Gunjević of Hamburg-Grindelberg Adventist Church has made international Adventist headlines lately for sporting non-regulation socks during his sermons. The pastor is the...
Adornment
How to Spot When an Adventist is Bragging
We Adventists like to at least appear humble. But once in a while some status signaling happens. You know an Adventist is bragging when...
Adornment
GC: Posting Selfies With Filters is “Bearing False Witness”
SILVER SPRING, Md. — The General Conference is cracking down on members using forgiving filters to enhance their selfies.
“Filters are basically Instagram makeup,” said...
Adornment
Miss Universe Pageant To Be Judged Solely On Inner Beauty
NEW YORK CITY, N.Y. --- Officials have announced that the next Miss Universe beauty pageant will be judged solely on the quality of contestants'...
Adornment
White Estate Releases “What Would Ellen Do?” Bracelets
SILVER SPRING, Md. --- The Ellen G. White Estate has released a line of "What Would Ellen Do?" (WWED) bracelets aimed at reminding Adventists...
Adornment
Kylie Jenner releases line of Adventist-approved “SabbathLipstick”
LOS ANGELES, Calif. --- Fast on her way to billionairedom, reality star entrepreneur Kylie Jenner has opened yet another line in her cosmetics empire:...