Monday, September 29, 2025

Adventist Culture

What Kind of Adventist Are You?

Every Adventist church has these folks. The question is: are you one of them… or all of them at once? The Tupperware Hoarder – You come to potluck with one...

10 Ways to Lose Friends and Influence Nobody: Adventist Edition

Are you tired of having too many friends? Do you wish people would stop inviting you to potlucks and Sabbath afternoon walks? Look no...

Adventist Grandma Insists She Is “Woke” Due to Trusty Alarm Clock

Local Adventist grandmother, Edna Pritchard, 87, proudly declared herself “woke” this Sabbath after a heated discussion at potluck about the youth’s obsession with trendy...

A Used Pathfinder Sash, and Other Presents for Adventists with Inconvenient January Birthdays

Wallet still recovering from Christmas? Fear not! Here's a list of budget-friendly gifts for the Adventist in your life who had the audacity to...

Decluttering Tips for Your Adventist Home

Feeling overwhelmed by your earthly possessions? Fear not, fellow Adventist hoarder! Here's your BarelyAdventist guide to decluttering your home faster than you can say...

Top 10 Adventist New Year’s Resolutions

1. Memorize All 13 Sabbath School Memory Verses Each Quarter - Commit to learning every single Adult Sabbath School quarterly memory verse so you...

Adventist Woman Accidentally Volunteers to Lead Her Own Baby Shower After Habitual ‘Yes’ Reflex Kicks In

Rachel Yeswuman, inadvertently volunteered to organize and lead her own baby shower. The incident occurred during last week’s women’s ministry meeting, where Rachel’s notorious...

6 Foolproof Strategies to Avoid Being Voluntold for Nominating Committee

As Adventists, we all know the dread that comes with those fateful words: "The Nominating Committee will now begin its work." If you're tired...

Adventist Baby’s First Words: “Happy Sabbath!”

LOMA LINDA, Calif. — In a stunning display of spiritual precocity, 6-month-old Jedediah Remnant stunned his parents and pediatrician by uttering the words "Happy...

New Adventist Board Game ‘Sabbath Loopholes’ Becomes Overnight Sensation

In a surprising turn of events, a new board game called "Sabbath Loopholes" has taken the Adventist world by storm, selling out in record...

99% of Adventists Would Rather Get Root Canals Than Teach Teen Sabbath School

A recent survey has found that an overwhelming majority of church members would prefer to undergo multiple root canals than volunteer to teach the...