Wednesday, October 16, 2024

Sunday Law

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Sunday Law

Adventist Town Gripped by Sunday Law Fears as Local Bakery Announces Sunday Closure

Hopeville, SDA - In news that has sent shivers down the spines of even the most seasoned doomsayers, Hopeville's beloved "Heavenly Pastries" bakery announced its doors will be closed...
Sunday Law

OpenAI CEO Sam Altman Predicts ChatGPT Will Declare Sunday Law

Adventists around the globe are feeling a chill run down their spines after OpenAI CEO Sam Altman expressed his apprehensions during a recent Senate...
Second Coming

GC: Uber Not Viable End Times Escape Plan

SILVER SPRING, Md. --- The General Conference leadership of the church has warned members not to plan on booking an Uber to escape to...
Sunday Law

GC Compliance Inspector Dispatched to Find Source of SCOTUS Leak

SILVER SPRING, Md. — Eager to lend a helping hand, the General Conference has dispatched a senior compliance inspector to the Supreme Court of...
Sunday Law

Paranoid Adventist “ready” for the Time of Trouble

MAGALIA, Calif. --- Paranoid Adventist Sayns Adatimes of Magalia, California spends his time frightening fellow Adventists and random passersby with "indisputable" current events updates...
Donald Trump

On eve of Iowa caucuses, Trump promises “YUGE” Sunday Law

IOWA CITY, Iowa --- On the day before the Iowa caucuses, GOP presidential candidate Donald Trump is doing his best to appeal to voters...
Prophesy

Saturday Law declared in Collegedale, Tenn.

COLLEGEDALE, Tenn. --- The Board of Commissioners for the City of Collegedale, Tenn. has passed a city-wide policy requiring all business and places of...

BarelyAdventist is a satire and humor blog focused on Adventist culture and issues. Written by committed Adventists, the goal is to foster growth within the faith community through lighthearted conversation and humor, avoiding soapboxing or angry rants. The blog is not officially endorsed by the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists.

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