SILVER SPRING, Md. — The Biblical Research Institute announced this morning that three weeks of intense study had led the team to conclude that it was unclear what would come first: the reopening Read more […]
SAN FRANCISCO, Calif. — Ridesharing platform Uber has added a “flee to the hills” button for Adventist customers aiming to escape the Time of Trouble. The firm’s leadership said that the button Read more […]
SILVER SPRING, Md. — The General Conference offices of the Adventist Church announced an Adventist answer to the Golden Globe awards yesterday. The brand new Golden Watch awards will “celebrate Read more […]
BERKSHIRE, England — In a last-ditch effort to stop Brexit proceedings, Newbold College had warned that the UK’s departure from the European Union could have “terrible consequences” on the menu Read more […]
Adventist World: A recently released study by an interdiscipinary team of Loma Linda University faculty has confirmed what many have long suspected: Adventists are born with two left feet. The Read more […]
WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump and soon-to-be Senator from Utah, Mitt Romney, felt extremely bad about the harsh words they’d hurled at each other over the last 24 hours and offered Read more […]
SILVER SPRING, Md. — The General Conference released what it called a “grave greeting” this morning wishing Adventists everywhere a “Compliant 2019.” The e-card greeting linked to “helpful guidance” Read more […]
SILVER SPRING, Md. — In what the GC is calling “the ultimate sign of bromantic, compliant UNITY,” General Conference President Ted Wilson and North American Division President Dan Jackson have Read more […]
Adventist World — Adventists making unspoken prayer requests will now be required to provide hints as to the nature of these mysterious petitions to the curious crowd around them. Whether on Read more […]
SILVER SPRING, Md. — GC President Ted Wilson’s unacknowledged but widely imagined skunkworks technology team sprung a internal compliance leak yesterday. An unnameable source listed three projects Read more […]
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