Church board votes to have more arguments

Board members of the Verdugo Seventh-day Adventist Church voted Tuesday on new protocol for their meetings, which includes more arguments, to ensure the meetings definitely go on for too long. The Read more […]

Biblical Research Institute: Carob in violation of 9th Commandment

TAKOMA PARK, Md. — In a landmark ruling for what many are calling the Supreme Court of the Adventist Church, the Biblical Research Institute has ruled that current advertising for carob products Read more […]

10 good things about being an Adventist

10.) A lack of dance skills is actually looked upon favorably. These dance moves by Adventists I have seen done, yes. 9.) Wearing long skirts means you hardly have to shave your legs. 8.) Read more […]

Old man praises Adventism’s sleep quality benefits

PORTLAND, Ore. —  Chuck Matthews, 75, says he’s been a Christian since he was a child but that his recent conversion to Adventism has worked wonders for his sleep.  “I converted mostly Read more […]

Ask Auntie Adventist: Is Adventism a cult?

Today we inaugurate a new feature, “Ask Auntie Adventist,” where all your burning questions about Adventism are answered by a highly opinionated, semi-trained professional (at what, we won’t Read more […]

Loma Linda centenarian sends would-be mugger to hospital

Loma Linda, Calif. — Muggers in the Loma Linda-area have been dealt a serious setback when it comes to access to the local geriatric population.  Ed Sutherland, 23, was no match for 110-year-old Read more […]

Post Record Keeper shut down, GC declares PowerPoint sole acceptable form of creative expression

Following the recent announcement that the General Conference was scrapping the much-anticipated release of the web series The Record Keeper, a set of guidelines for acceptable creative expression Read more […]

New study reveals findings on “Pew Paralysis”

Most Seventh-day Adventist church-goers, ranging from the casual to the committed, have experienced what researchers call “pew paralysis”— once seated, they remain confined to a space roughly Read more […]